Three Words.


So innocuous. So unthreatening. So harmless. Yet together they can change our lives substantially. And changed our lives they have.

I am not talking about the platonic "I love you" that we say to our parents, kids, siblings, friends or grandparents. I am talking about, yes you guessed it, the "I love you" that we say to those special someones in our lives. Most of us are in ILIASM now because we at one point or another said these three words with utmost sincerity to someone who we believed to be our lifelong companion. We, as most logical, sensible and passionate people do, eventually put the M in ILIASM.

Looking back to my teenage years when I started dating, I have only said "I love you" to three people. Three. Count them. One, two, three. Like anyone who's had a healthy dating life since their high school years, I have dated more than three people in my life. Without specific intention, reason, or personal operating guideline, I have somehow only bestowed (what a funny word!) these three words on only three women in my entire life. W is one of them. And yelling quietly out into the cosmic universe to the other two ladiees; you know who you are. And yes, there were a few steady girlfriends who have never heard these three words from me. That's because these three words are precious to me.  They are priceless.  And I don't just give them out easily.

Looking back at these three relationships, it is not as important to consider the "who" as it is to think about the "what". In all three relationships, there are something chemically, emotionally, hormonally and physically special about them in their own different ways that make them extraordinary for me. In my mind these relationships exist at a completely different universe than all the others. Deep connections were made and the heart strings were tightly tugged. Real emotions are felt. Even to this day, I can still feel the intensity that is so untouchable and complete about these three love relations that make them breathtaking. They are different relationships, but one word separate them from all others: Magical.

My "I Love You Club" is an exclusive group of only three members. There is no right number for membership for that club, but that is not the point here. I simply feel fortunate to have loved and be loved so deeply and unapologetically in each case. Regardless of where these relationships are today, there is a "forever" quality to the "I love you" that I gave to these three ladies and the "I love you" that I received back from them that will eternally live in me. Because our love for each other have changed me and helped me to be who I am. Thank you to all three of you. Perhaps this is the forever nature of love that people talk about when someone decided that love and forever should exist together. Or perhaps it is the intensity of these relationships that make them so memorable.

Have you thought about your "I Love You Club"? For most of us, I am willing to bet that poking at the memories of your very own "I Love You Club" will bring a warm smile to your face. As for me, with my pending departure from my SM, I am sure the time will come for my club to add maybe a couple more members. However, I intend to keep this an exclusive club for the ones whom I will genuinely love and who will truly love me back.
DolphinSmiles DolphinSmiles
41-45, M
6 Responses May 25, 2012

Smiles, I can see by your story why it has been a huge struggle for you to come to some clusions in your marriage. Your love runs deep. I wish she could see this....then she wouldn't let you down and go like she has.<br />
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As for me, I use the love word too easily. But I will say for those who have not done me wrong, I will love until my dying day and beyond if I can. There is currently two people that I share a deep love with. One though is what feels like a soul-connection. We will likely never be together in a true romantic, marriage like relationship but he is so much to me that he is always wth me. I know he would never let me down and I trust him with my life. The other is my husband. There is a lot missing in my marriage but my husband does love me and our family. He has a lot of good qualities that many men don't have. We connected so many years ago for a reason. I hope to find it again.

I have always heard those words first from my partners, never have I said them first.<br />
I also say it frequently, but those words spoken to me, lost their "magic" effect, after I had my kids.<br />
I never knew what how powerful those words truly were until spoken from a genuine childs mouth, who says it just because thats how they feel, and not out of malice.<br />
He still says it to me to this day, but it doesn't move me, not anymore, they are just words.<br />
Sorry if I went off topic, this is how I truly feel.

Your post has taken me on a pleasant trip down memory lane DS, so thanks for that.<br />
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It is a term I have used very sparingly over the journey, as I was not prepared to say it unless I was going to deliver on it. (I am talking about adult relationships here).<br />
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Funny thing is, that now days, in my circumstances today, I hand the words out easily and often.<br />
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Tread your own path.

It bothers me that some use it so freely as I never really understand the meaning.....<br />
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I know what it means to me and if I say it - I mean it...

I have said I love you only when I meant it. I hope I can find it in my cold black heart to say it to one more person. And that person will know it and feel it. Sigh.

I sayt "I love you" easaily - maybe too easily. But these words can hold a VAST range of emtions. I believe that the emotion that underlies them is the significant factor - and that emotion should be supported and confirmed by all your actions.<br />
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"I love you!" to the dress shop owner who finds what you want in your sizew is just an empty ex<x>pression, albeit of appreciation!! The "I love you" to the person in tyour life witrh whom you share the closest and most intimate of bonds is incomparable to any other statement IMO.

I had an ex girlfriend that used to say I love you every time she opened her mouth - it was suffocating, and ultimately the words meant nothing to me.