Well since my last post Ive been reading and trying to learn. I finally stood up to my wife. I really did and she tried to make me feel really bad. But this time I knew it was coming. So I guess it didn't hurt as much. I actually think it was good for her because she finally had nothing to say. She just left the room. Not that she hasn't done that before, but usually she does it to hurt me and this time she did it because she couldn't respond to me. She likes to think she is smarter and actually she probably is when it comes to how to hurt someone. I have also read almost every story here and Im learning that its not just about sex. I mean the no sex is the worst because I have no control there, but I can see from everyone's stories something about the traits of the "refuser" I like that. It helps. It means that we do share a common experience and that people who take sex away from their spouses have already taken many other things away. I no longer will let her have my thoughts!