I Don't Think I'd Let Him Touch Me If He Tried Anymore...I've been married to my husband for almost 6 years, together for 3 years before that. We have two beautiful preschool aged children, which is the only reason I haven't left him. I can't support the three of us without him. I'm in school to finish my degree so by the time the kids start school I'll be done, and I'm leaving him then. I'm already concocting my plan to escape. It's kind of relieving because now I don't feel like I have to suffer through trying to make this marriage work anymore. Now I'm in control, now I'm just waiting it out until I have that degree in my hand so I can provide for my children without his help.
I started formulating this plan when I realized recently that I don't even want him to touch me. Typically we have sex about twice a year now, and that's only when I throw a major hissy fit and make appointments with counselors and threaten to leave, so he gives in to placate me. Currently its been about 4 months I think since we had sex. We sit on opposite sides of the couch when the kids go to bed. We never touch. I can't remember the last hug or kiss I got from him. The only affection I ever receive is from my kids. I've decided that I'm not going to beg anymore. He seems perfectly content to just roll over and go to sleep after the news every night, and I'm perfectly content to let him. I don't think I want him to touch me. I don't think I like him enough to let him anymore. In fact, I'm beginning to question whether I even love him anymore. It makes me sad to think that. I used to love him, so much. I think that I've been emotionally beaten down so much that I've just shut down all emotions towards him now. Is this normal? Is this really the end, or am I just really frustrated at the moment? Does anyone else ever feel like if your spouse tried to touch you, you wouldn't let them? I don't hate him. I don't think I have the energy to hate him. I just feel sad for him and for our marriage.
theturkeyswife 26-30, F 13 Responses 2 Jun 22, 2012