New Insight @ My Marriage's DownfallOkay, I was browsing some of the "taken in hand" stories last night. Well some new revelations popped into my head.
It doesn't change my marriage but it changes my views a little bit about my marriage.
I realized just HOW many things were going on at the same time.
1. A woman had been going around saying she wanted to marry my husband. She didn't care that he was married or had 3 children that were difficult.
He was going to go to a marriage interview because he thought that if she was married to him, she'd be willing to help me out with the kidz and stuff.
I was fine until I found a hotel receipt in his pocket which he claimed was to help him get used to sleeping alone for this 5 month trip he went on. 4 months in morocco and 1 month in NC to see his family.
2. We found out the children had autism. I was relieved because the children weren't bad or whatever because I didn't know how to be a mother, or because I wasn't a black woman (he's black) or because I wasn't raised around lots of younger children. There was a reason (other than me) for their behavior.
3. We got on SSI and I got in more control of the money. I became more independent. I have since cut him off of my bank account. He can't access it from his account and he can NOT login to my bank to get money w/o telling me. Now I can budget and get stuff that we need for the house and kidz and yes, ME.
I realize now life was better when he had a REGULAR job that he went to EVERYDAY. And when he had control of all the money. He liked being in control. he liked being the man, except when it comes time to appointments and grocery shopping. So its weird- on one hand he wants me to a sahm but then he wishes I was more independent millenium woman.