Sexless Marriage I'm Stuck

I am in a sexless marriage and I "want out". My partner is not ready to listen to me. I have tried almost everything but nothing worked. I can't cheat on my partner and now I am seriously thinking of filing for divorce. We have 4 kids and divorce will hurt them. Two are in their teenage while two are too little.
seemego seemego
4 Responses Jul 31, 2012

I have been wrestling with a similar situation. The marriage is just about done..I wanted to save it, but she did not. She seems to be content just drifting along without any intimacy whatsoever. I mean nothing. Like roommates, really. I also think she is emotionally abusive towards me: disrespectful, hurtful, distant.. Seems like a a recipe for getting out, but there are young children involved. Would they be hurt more by not seeing their parents together? Or by growing up watching a dysfunctional relationship that ultimately ends up leading them to think this is what "love" is? I wake up every morning feeling sadness and wondering if this is the day I should just walk out the door. I can empathize with your situation.

i think the phrase...damned if you do and damned if you dont applies.<br />
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good luck with either decision

thank you for this detailed reply. I am worried about my kids' custody which is keeping from filing for divorce.

Key fact = you want out.<br />
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Go and see a lawyer in your jurisdiction to see how a divorce will shake out for you.<br />
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Of particular relevance to you will additionally be custody matters, financial support issues, visitation rights and suchlike.<br />
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Following the advice of your lawyer will achieve your aim to "get out".<br />
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There's no easy way out, unfortunately. But once it's done, it does have the upside of putting an emphatic full stop to the dysfunctional marriage, and providing you with an opportunity to move on into a more fulfilling phase of life. Staying on, in misery, offers very little in the way of upsides.<br />
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Tread your own path.