Death By Spouse

I posted these thoughts today in the string (Carrying The Invisible Burden Of A Sexless Marriage) and I've been thinking about the subject.

Given that our denier spouses - many of them - are keenly aware of our suffering and choose to do nothing to alleviate it I have to wonder why this is.

I'm pretty much convinced my ******* Denier Husband (hereafter referred to as ADH) is trying to kill me with reckless driving. I have a pretty good sized insurance policy that would pretty well match the rest of my expected lifetime earnings so why the hell not? Slashing my throat, poisoning or shooting me would be too obvious but wrapping my side of the car first around a telephone pole or a tree could be chalked up to a tragic accident.

Maybe aggravated vehicular homicide could be brought to bear but given that hardly anyone knows my agony - plenty can see it - a motive would be hard to prove. Towards that end I've made our marriage therapist aware today of my suspicions.

All this leads me to wonder...how far out of the ballpark are the following scenarios?

"Him? Oh, his heart exploded in his chest. There was nothing left to autopsy. He left me with a big insurance policy though - at least he did one thing right."

"Oh, my wife died in a car accident. Yeah, it was terrible - I was driving. The car hit a tree on her side and she was crushed/killed instantaneously. At least it was quick. Hey babe -  it's good to see you. Whatcha' doin' for dinner tonight?"

"She went to sleep and never woke up. Overdose. She was a pill freak. Hey baby, you're lookin' good..."

"He died last year of prostate cancer. It was horrible. I was so overwhelmed - I bought a timeshare in the Caymans and spend a lot of time there now..."

"He committed suicide and left me with three kids. Fortunately there was an insurance policy that paid off the mortgage or I wouldn't have been able to stay in my home. My oldest is graduating college and my other two are in high school. Just two left in the nest..."

If you need an example of the disregard many if not most of our abusing spouses hold us in go read GibbySan's remarks in my story "Parental Example" posted two days ago (Sept3). Now THAT's a sobering eye-full. I could see my ADH doing that.  Yeah I can.

See what I'm sayin' here?
How far afield really are these thoughts?
Fool4Waiting Fool4Waiting
56-60, F
4 Responses Sep 4, 2012

Hmmm....Just add "dad" to the end of your acronym and we've got "ADHD." It adds a new dimension to the statement "I've got ADHD." I like it.

It is about 2003.<br />
I am in bed with my then missus, and I awake.<br />
It is about 3am, and it is deathly quiet. I can't even hear her breathing.<br />
I listen intently to hear what it was that woke me. I am wide wide awake, and keenly alert.<br />
Burgler ?<br />
No. There is not a sound, bar the fridge coming on several rooms away. Not even the sound of her breathing.<br />
Hey !! She doesn't seem to have breathed for quite a while.<br />
How long does it take to croak if you stop breathing ? i read somewhere that after 2 minutes there is irreversible brain damage great that'd be just dandy to have a vegetative spouse as well as a refuser well surely 5 minutes would result in death which would bring this all to a close and 10 minutes would be a certainty for that to happen and would i then call the cops or ambulance or what and it must now be about 4 minutes so lets just see what happens so don't touch or try and rouse her.<br />
<br />
I slip silently out of bed.<br />
I go to the loungeroom after getting a coffee.<br />
I sit. Watch the clock.<br />
30 minutes.<br />
Surely it is done.<br />
<br />
I nod off on the couch.<br />
<br />
Something awakes me. The first bit of sunrise. I hear a noise.<br />
In the bathroom.<br />
It is her, taking a ****.<br />
<br />
Dang.<br />
<br />
Dysfunctional marriages sure **** with your head.<br />
<br />
Tread your own path.

Oh. I see this can cut both ways. Hmmm.... ;)

I just shot coffee out my nose.

OMG that made me laugh, sorry.

With all due respect to Fool4, Apo and Ocean, that was NOT a work of fiction or a creative writing exercise. It is a shameful fact of where my head once was. baz

1 More Response

Very interesting thoughts and if you think how crazy it is to say you love someone but still refuse then these scenarios do not sound so far fetched.

Sometimes when there is underlying stress our imaginations work overtime. That is not to say such accidents have not been deliberate.