I Wanna Hold Your Hand

I walked out of a restaurant with my fellow married (but not to me) soon to be short-term FWB out of a restaurant a few months ago and instinctively held his hand. After a few moments, he let it go. "Not in public."

I felt so crest-fallen. I barely knew him at that point, but his hand felt so good in mine. Since that, we've touched each others' bodies in almost every possible way.

But we've never held hands again.

Hand-holding is way too intimate.

Yeah, I know he's "happily married" and I'm just technically married and getting caught was at the very least awkward.

Up until that point, I hadn't held hands with a man for over 20 years. The first and only being my husband whom I'm leaving.


Actually, I had held hands with a man I met before I met the guy at Tokyo Joe's.  We were at a distant park and walked hand in hand.  I didn't have quite the same feeling though because the man in the park was so much taller than me that holding his had was physically uncomfortable because I felt like my arm was being stretched.  As it turns out, this very tall man was in a marriage in which he and his wife were both aware of each other's cheating, so he wasn't as careful.
sweetbutterbiscuit sweetbutterbiscuit
41-45, F
3 Responses Sep 17, 2012

I think that's sad. I hear rumors that there are married vixens out there, seeking random hookups due to voracious sexual appetites. I'm not one of them. I think for the majority of us, if we venture out, it's to find the intimacy & closeness missing in our present relationship.

One of the neatest things a guy can do to show me he really digs me -- is to hold my hand in public. Yes. I know. Discretion is required and all -- but really, after you've gone to the precaution of meeting this person in a place far, far from home, are they really such squirrely wusses that they can't hold your frickin' HAND?

Of course - the "barely knew him" part may have been the issue with this one. ..

"Of course - the "barely knew him" part may have been the issue with this one. ."

Very true! I took his hand because we had been canoodling in the restaurant booth and forgot myself.

We need a list of abbreviations in here!

Interesting this.

Usually, the FWB scenario is initially undertaken for sex. Not d&m discussions or intimacy, just sex.

And, just as often, the FWB relationship develops a momentum of its' own, involving MORE than sex. Often driven by the real component missing in the marriage - which (personal opinion only) is more to do with being with a person who you think enough of to WANT sex with, who reciprocates your desire, who you connect with (at least sexually).

This FWB might be taking the role straight down the "I'm just here for the sex" line. Nothing wrong with that either - if it is mutually agreed. I gather from your story that it is NOT mutually agreed though.

That would suggest that a bit of caution might need to be exercised by you.

Tread your own path.

Agreed. We didn't stay together long fortunately because our schedules never coincided. Who knew at my ripe old age that sex would be 1st base and holding hands would be 4th?