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I Want Sex; Is It Wrong To Be Intimate With Another Women While Separated?

I am soon to be separated from my wife of 15 years and on my own. While technically still married, would it be wrong to have sex with another woman during that time? I crave the soft touch of a woman and the warmth that making love provides. Any thoughts out there... woman what do you think?
cvann5 cvann5 51-55, M 11 Responses Sep 21, 2012

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I think it would be wrong, your marriage is not over just because you are separated.

i would hold off until the divorce is final because it can be used against you.

my aunt was in a sexless marriage for years. it took her a while to be ready for intimacy even with being out of a toxic relationship for a while. it wasn't just physical craving, she had to heal from what it did to her mind and heart.

I think you may be right. It's going to take me some time to get this mannequin out of my head.

yes I hope the divorce goes swiftly for you

Run this by a lawyer first. Personally if you are seperating due to her putting you through a sexless marriage i would say morally you are right.

But morally and legally are two seperate issues.

Stay Strong & Good Luck

Frustrated netted this one out. I would add that this would depend on how your spouse would react. (will she get ugly, even though she is the refuser?)Your lawyer is most likely going to advise against since s/he is trying to protect your interest.

a woman here....i say, as long as you think you will be okay after (not too clingy, not feeling guilty), and you're discreet about it, and it won't affect the circumstances of your separation & eventual divorce? go for it. enjoy.

and treat the woman with affection & respect.

I don't know how I would feel; it has been so long that I have been intimate with a women (as opposed to a blender I guess) that I'm not sure how I would feel. Do I idealize sex too much?

if it has been anywhere near as long for you as it's been for me, i think idealizing is inevitable. i only hope it's like riding a bicycle (one never forgets) and like wine (it doesn't get older it gets better). :)

It seems there are a lot of problem in USA with all things surrounded the marriage... In UK nobody would think twice... If you need my permission go and catch up for all sex you were deprived before!

Lets consider different angles of the situation:
1.Legal aspect - if you can make sure your soon-to-be ex would not know it, then cheers and good luck!!
2.Are you emotionally ready? make sure you will not go clinggy on the next woman you will be intimate with.. or worse, use a sad story to be in bed with her then avoid her after by saying you're not ready..
However, if you happen to be in a lucky situation and asking advise to check on your conscience.. id say Go for it!! it will be a thrilling experience! just make sure you still have the moves.. :))

check with your attorney and go for it.

Hasn't the world got to a crazy place when you have to check with an attorney before you can have sex.

Personally I think it's ok and most people wouldn't judge if you're already separated and definitely headed toward divorce - and you keep it circumspect.

But as other have advised, just ask your lawyer if it can affect your case. It might be worth the wait.

First, you have to look at the divorce court options, do you have an at fault divorce state?

Second, you have to determine if there is any chance of you getting back together at any point with your spouse. If you do decide to stay together, intimate relations with other people may cause further problems.

<p>You need to pose that question to your legal counsel. The answer depends solely on your jurisdiction.</P>

The moral judgements on this are yours to make, no-one elses.

But you'd do well to check out if the laws in your jurisdiction have anything to say about this - in regards to the wind up of your current marriage. In the 'wrong' jurisdiction, your proposed rooting spree could prove quite expensive.

Tread your own path.