I Live In a Sexless Marriage

I Am Scared Of My Husbands Rejection.

By: Nikro

Written on October 9th, 2012

We only have sex if he initiates it. He knows I will always say yes because I figure I have to take what I can get. I never know when the offer will be given again.

When I did try to initiate sex, he always give me a rejection. He acts like I am ridiculous and tells me I think sex = love. It hurts me when he says that. I don't try any more. Neither does he.

I feel like I am here only for my house making and mothering duties. I feel very undesirable and very little like a woman. Im just existing in this marriage.

By: Nikro

Age: 36-40

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20 responses

IMakeYourWifeCum

I understand how you feel. I am just a room mate in my marriage. It took me a long time but eventually I learned to accept it and I now took matters into my own hands (figuratively and literally). I learned that I am responsible for my own happiness so I do what I have to do. I never wanted or intended for this to happen. I entered into marriage with every intention on being with just her but she doesnt want to be with me.

Oct 10, 2012
1 like
IMakeYourWifeCum

I understand how you feel. I am just a room mate in my marriage. It took me a long time but eventually I learned to accept it and I now took matters into my own hands (figuratively and literally). I learned that I am responsible for my own happiness so I do what I have to do. I never wanted or intended for this to happen. I entered into marriage with every intention on being with just her but she doesnt want to be with me.

Oct 10, 2012
1 like
heterochromia

Why don't you just ask him what the deal is? Why is it so hard for most of the people here to realize that the bottom line is communication?
Tell him you are afraid of rejection. Tell him what you want. Ask him why he isn't meeting your expectations.
If he tries to avoid the confrontation, tell him the stakes.
It's not hard, people. Take responsibility for what you want out of life.

Oct 10, 2012
1 like
- GibbySan
  Why don't you refrain from making comments on a subject about which you know nothing?
  Perhaps you'd like to pop on over to the "I lost someone to suicide" group and tell them they need to "just get over it already!"
  
  Oct 10, 2012
  1 like
- angryguy77
  Heterochromia: Why don't you get a clue. Odds are, people who have posted here, are here because they feel they've run out of options-including communication.
  You obviously know nothing about this topic or what people go through when living in a SM.
  
  Oct 10, 2012
  1 like
- smithy8015
  heterochomia: get a friggin clue. if you had half a brain, you might realize that those of us here in this group have beat our heads against the brick walls that our refusing spouses have built....for YEARS. and have tried innumerable approaches. most of us wind up here at the end of our rope, so to speak.
  next time don't speak before learning a little more about the topic, mkay?
  
  Oct 10, 2012
  1 like
BullsEyeDJ

There's always Cybersex
:-P

Oct 10, 2012
1 like
cutegorilla

Talk to him about how you feel about this. Make some time when you both go to bed early and have time to cuddle and spend time together in bed.

Oct 10, 2012
1 like
mama2boyz

I am right there with u...the whole sex=love thing...heard that one...the only way to show u I care is by f*#k@$g you...no...not at all...but it does help!..lol

Oct 10, 2012
2 likes
Hillary1160

I love this story , because this reminds me, my marriage an I just try an keep my head up an not tell my family , so I don't let my parents down

Oct 9, 2012
2 likes
mvcmvc

Taking into context your other story, I recommend you seek individual counselling.
You do have some issues that, once sorted out with a competent therapist, might enable you to move forward with more confidence and get "unstuck".

Oct 9, 2012
3 likes
genguy

Prediction: As you read more here you are gonna start getting some ideas...You MIGHT even start to have resentful feelings toward Hubby...Getting on EP is like being a virgin...Ain't no goin' back!! WELCOME !! We are here to help you on your journey!

Oct 9, 2012
4 likes
Pmacphoto

So many men are just stupid jerks and all they care about is themselves. Sometimes I hate my fellow men for the way they treat their wives or girlfriends. There are lots of folks here that can help you so stay strong, positive and hold your head high.

Oct 9, 2012
3 likes
Frustrated1978

Keep reading here. You will learn plenty. Oh as for your feelings regarding house making child carer, your first impressions are usually right.
Stay Strong & Good Luck

Oct 9, 2012
5 likes
bazzar

I think you have quite a firm grip on reality here. Your summation of what your role in this relationship is entirely accurate - AND, you don't seem to be struggling under any illusion that it is likely to get any better.
These are two bits of priceless information you have.
Now comes the hard bit.
What are you going to do with this information ?
Keep it as theoretical data ? - or use it to start propelling yourself forward ?
Tread your own path.

Oct 9, 2012
3 likes
- Nikro
  Im not sure what I am going to do with this information. I am kind of stuck right now. I need to dig my way out.
  
  Oct 9, 2012
  1 like
- bazzar
  You could go see a lawyer in your jurisdiction and find out how a divorce would shake out for you. That'd be valuable information to have don't you think ?
  
  Oct 9, 2012
  1 like
JRD22

You are in the right place. Read, make friends and do for yourself. When you are out in public take the time to smile and flirt. keep eye contact and feel it back. You are number 1.

Oct 9, 2012
2 likes
enna30

Nikro, your husband is treating you badly by rejecting your advances. He is a person who needs to control you by only having sex when HE wants to. This controlling behaviour is NOT good in a marriage.
Please read stories and posts in the forum here about sexless marriage. That way you will better understand the situation you are in.

Oct 9, 2012
3 likes
zsuzsilowinger

Keep reading on here. You are not alone.

Oct 9, 2012
2 likes

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