The Issue Of Weight Gain. Who's To Blame?Apologies if this is the wrong group to post this in but I have seen another story in here on a similar topic. So I think this post might be relevant to that particular post as well as to other issues pertaining to sexless marriages.
Bear in mind that this is coming from a single man. I only wish to express my opinions on the subject and would be interested to hear what everyone else thinks.
So if no one ob
This response was in reference to another post - Why Females Gain Weight After Marriage
I do not think that the writer of this piece is asking for perfection, just attraction. I like women in all shapes and sizes including women with full figures, but full can become fat in an instant. Is it shallow of me to not be so attracted once that happens? One thing you need to realise is that men are visually stimulated creatures. I believe women are more verbally stimulated. For this reason it might be difficult for a woman to comprehend why looks are so important to a man.
Think of it this way. If a man used to say the nicest things to you, and then stopped making the effort to do so once you got married. How would that make you feel? Betrayed?
It's not as simple as it may seem. It is not a simple matter of exercising. Issues of self esteem and the individuals mental health must also be taken into account. A lot has to be asked of the man in the picture. Did he stop complementing and encouraging his woman. By encourage I do not mean telling her she needs to lose weight. I mean taking her out to places where she would have to put the effort in to look good. Restaurants, places where formal dress is expected, the beach or even the gym (less subtle perhaps).
Before a woman puts in the effort to want to maintain the flames in the relationship, there has to be a flame worth keeping alight. And both parties are responsible for keeping this flame alight. Sometimes fault lies with one party more than the other, but often times blame can be assigned to both parties.
Openness is definitely essential in any relationship. If you do not feel comfortable or competent enough to maintain this openness then it would probably be wise to seek professional help. Sometimes all you need is an unbiased opinion to hear both sides of the story. To interpret how both parties feel, and to help the other understand what his or her spouse feels.
That's just what I think.
Scorpio1987 22-25, M 8 Responses 0 Nov 16, 2012