My Sexless StoryI've been living in a sexless marriage on and off for 8 yrs. We get into a good sex groove and then a 2-4 months sex drought. It drives me insane at times. I 've tried everything, being romantic, talking, reading books, group sex (that was some of the best times in my life), etc. I feel like I am talking to a brick wall. She has no interest at all in sex. Only time she is interested is if we are doing something with a mutual group or if she has been drinking. When I bring it up she tells me that she has too much on her mind to even begin to think about pleasing her man, or anything. She plays games on her phone, looks up cooking recipes, reads book, and goes to sleep. I try and I get rejected time and time again. The last time we had sex was the first week in October 2012. I took her to a show in November 2012 out of state. We stayed at a nice hotel, she took a relaxing bubble bath, slept naked and fell asleep. The next morning she asked me about having sex, I told her get on top, she told me she was to tired to do all that. Let's just make it a quickie. Was I worth her trying to please me. I'm tired of the missionary postitions, its nice and all but I'm doing all the work. I told her I'm all set we can just get breakfast. This is the story of my life, a constant sexual let down.
I have a friend that I talk to and that helps. She is in the same boat with her husband. I feel so alone sometimes. Its not fair. We have no connection when it comes to intimacy. We are two adults co-parenting in the same household. I hold so much resentment towards her and she has no idea. I have two kids and would never think of leaving them, but I'm growing frustrated by the day. Sharing a life with someone that has no desire for you is a sad feeling. I am dying inside for her affection, her love, her warmth, her body. I miss her so much even though we sleep on opposite sides of the bed.
I'm tired of living this way. I've decided to see a therapist about this situation. I'm not going to mention it to her. I know she would want to come, but I don't want to hear all the bullshit excuses. I need help accepting that this will be my life if I decide to stay with her. I need to know how to lose all this built up anger and just live my life. I think an open relationship is the only option if i choose to stay. If not I will end up resenting this woman for the rest of my life.