If Guys Want Sex So Much...

Why are they so passive?

Why do they flirt, but don't make the next move?

Why do they claim they want a relationship, but don't act?

Why do they get all mad for no good reason?

And most importantly....

Why am I alone in bed?

*just wonderin"...cuz I'm kinda hot
imathinkin imathinkin
51-55, F
3 Responses Nov 28, 2012

So much of what you say depends on your perspective.

Passive - There were times after rejection that I just couldn't put my heart/needs out there to get stomped on one more time. I also had the burden of being very bright and perceptive, but socially unskilled; probably borderline asperger's. It wasn't passive, it was being profoundly unsure of myself.

Flirting - for me I think, what's that? Anymore if somebody would interest me I'd just let them know. No effin' games. I can't be cruel, but many men are so unsure, or blind to signals (that low-grade asperger's again) that it may seem like they are playing.

Relationships - works both ways. I could kick my brother-in-law's *** sometimes. Divorced, he goes out on dates, gets laid, and does not even call the women back one way or the other. It infuriates me (with my current issues) and I feel that I'd like to kneecap him one of these days to feel physically what it is like to be played with emotionally.

Good luck

that was interesting to read, thanks

I'll give you a 'stream of conciousness' reply:-


"Why are they so passive?"

Because they've been rejected repeatedly, sometimes to the point
of public humiliation, in the past.


"Why do they flirt, but don't make the next move?"

Because they're receiving no positive signals or encouragement, or
at best they're unclear.


"Why do they claim they want a relationship, but don't act?"

Fear of being hurt.


"Why do they get all mad for no good reason?"

Repressed anger.


"And most importantly....

Why am I alone in bed?

*just wonderin"...cuz I'm kinda hot"

Possibly because *you* have been passive, have flirted but haven't
made the next move, have wanted a relationship but didn't act.

Try it. Go on.

One, because you'll perhaps learn that it's not that easy to steel
yourself to go and hit on someone (and why guys can be a bit diffident
at times). Two, because you're very likely to get what you're looking
for.


[N.B. Bazzar is also right, so be prepared for occasional rejection.]

I don't want sex. I want a relationship...with sex. If I hit on someone, I am guaranteed the first, but not the second. I guess that's why I don't make a move.

Forgive me for making fun of you here...

You're "guaranteed" sex if you hit on someone - then you must be off the chart on the 'femme fatale' spectrum!

On a slightly more serious note.

I reckon being pro-active in the flirting/dating game is how you get into a relationship. They're just different facets of the same object (I'm using a more complex variation on 'two sides of the same coin'), i.e. sex is kind of inseparable from an intimate, sexual, loving relationship.

I don't mean ANY guy...but I could get "lucky" without much effort...if you call that luck.

This is true for men as well. I think the only reason the idea that it is not persists because of people's teenage experience.

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Your basic premise is wrong.

"All blokes want sex"

BzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzzzzz !!!!!!!!!!!!

WRONG !!

Tread your own path.

Ok I like you...so I won't get mad. But, I am in bed ALONE. Enough said.

And whose path would I tread...someone elses????

I was trying to be funny...even if it didn't come out that way.

(All blokes don't want sex...I have proof.)

What matters is not what other men think or want, but what the man in your life thinks, wants, or does not want. And the other issue is, if this man originally came across very differently, and now all of a sudden, he is no longer interested. And damn, now......you are married....And, now Houston! ....we have a problem.

There is no man in my life, nobody serious anyway. I agree with what you said about "now all of a sudden"...been there too.

There was some quote years ago by Mae West, who reputedly said in regard to blokes desirability - "it ain't the men in my life that matter, it's the life in the men"

too true!!!

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