Selfish RefusersI am not exploring "why's" just thinking out loud with others --
Are all refusers selfish? Or just mine? What does it matter, I know -- but just curious. My mom is coming down for a visit tonight and I have been way busy with work and also my kettlebell classes and cardio boxing classes at night. My husband literally watches tv from the moment he gets home at 5 pm until the moment he goes to bed at 11. SIX HOURS. Does he even realize he does that? SIX HOURS of WATCHING TV???
The house was not mom-worthy and needed major cleaning. I had to RUSH home today after my clients and get to cleaning in my work clothes -- scrubbing showers, toilets, floors, making her bed with fresh linens, etc.... and the whole time I am thinking, "Would he even CONSIDER lifting a finger to clean because we have company coming?" NO - he wouldn't. Doesn't even cross his mind.
I know, men can't read minds. I have asked in the past -- I am tired of asking because it's like living with a teenager. "When your show is over will you PLEASE help with the dishes? " (sickening!!!)
I didn't think to ask him because frankly I have been busy. But what a shocker it would have been if just ONCE in our marriage I came home and he said, "Hey hon I took care of ............" (anything, something)
Then there is the matter of the Christmas tip for my kettlebell trainers. They are amazing people who show up enthusiastic and passionate about teaching the class (two of them) even if I am the only one there. Yesterday they gave me pink wrist bands that say "Hard Core 24/7" because they said I train Hard Core. I see them three days a week and also take other classes for a mere $70/month. That is a STEAL. I am getting personal training for nothing. So I got them each $20 gift certificates and a christmas card, as appreciation. My husband said, "Why did you do that, that's what your membership is for."
Mind you - we are saving money, etc, but we are not THAT hard up we can't give these gifts. He does a lot with his money for HIMSELF this is what I do with MY money.
But the fact he can't fathom giving the tip bugs me greatly.
Probably explains why he has nothing to give in the bedroom. He is selfish. He receives no joy from giving to others, or he doesn't even know what it feels like because he hasn't done it. Gifts to his mom? All the ones that she says she will "cherish forever?" --- those came from me. when I am gone, I feel bad for her, because she will notice.
I don't know -- just more sexless thoughts shared out loud.