Odd SwitchSo, I was watching some tv with lovergirl. I got up, had a drink of water, and sat back down. Suddenly, I know I was a different person - a switch went off in my head, and I felt what I can only gather is some closure over my marriage. Like there was some pain I was hanging onto, that pain that was the last remaining tie to my marriage, and suddenly it was gone. I literally feel like a new person - not in any kind of liberated way, but I feel reconnected with my own self, no longer a reaction to what happened. The main thing I feel is calm.
In part I think it is because my life has stabilized - I will have my own place in a few weeks, I am working as a research assistant, taking a full load of grad school classes and doing very well. I don't feel like I'm reaching for branches to level myself, I just feel like I'm standing on my own feet. It feels good, but at the same time, it is not some wild happy feeling. Just content. Just closure.
Here's hoping it sticks.