More To The Story: Details On Does Everyone Just Love Your Refusing Spouse?I will also add that my parents do know how unhappy I am, and when we did separate for awhile he and my father continued to spend time together sharing their mutual hobby. They just don't...care. My circle of real friends has dwindled to almost none, as most of them have moved away. Then I moved away. My child has autism, and it's incredibly hard to get out and do the things required to keep friends. I go to work, and come home. I work nights.
I don't know. I constantly get accused of things. Of cheating, of lying. Of talking about this or that. He says that he knows how to monitor network traffic to see everything coming in and going out on the internet. (I have no idea if this is true, but plausible.) He says that he will do everything in his power to just make me miserable, to take my son away, etc. if we were to get divorced. I'm just tired, and he always has ways to make me feel trapped. I sometimes wish he was sexual, and would cheat, just so he'd WANT to leave.
He's been physical, but not in a few years. That actually stopped when we got back together. But his facebook quote sickens me: "I won't be wronged. I won't be insulted. I won't be laid a hand on. I don't do these things to other people, and I require the same from them." I don't know why it bothers me so much. Because it's a lie? I cried when he put that on there.
I told him last week that I wanted a divorce. He said it was only fair that he be allowed to save money to get a place where we live, near our son and his job. I'm sure that that will take months, if he even bothers saving.
I don't know why he wants to stay in this marriage. He has to be just as miserable as I am. When we were separated, he alternated between mean & spiteful, having a great time, and depressed and threatening suicide.
Obviously there are deeper issues than just not having sex. But it's not bad ALL of the time. I almost wish it was, I think that it would make me stronger. I keep getting flurries of hope, even if intellectually I know that there is none. I feel like I've given and tried, and accepted every excuse.