Use It Or Lose It ( A Cautionary Tale)

As you may or may not know, my marriage has been slowly dying the sexless life for years. In the beginning it was good sex but never frequent enough for me.
then 2 yrs ago things happened and he had health issues that took him into a spiral downward. And over those years we have become almost completly sexless. once every couple months or so. And now it is to where i am torn.
He is a good man and in many ways i still love him. But things are not good.

Several months back i noticed a serious decrease in the diamater of his shaft.
And last night he made a lackluster attempt at romance. (because i told him i was done being mad at him for refusing me, and that with therapy i would choose to stay or go)
So during the failed attempt of last evening i discovered something that shocked me. His testicles are gone. They have simply vanished. I am wondering if he simply has none because of a hormone issue, or if they left because he never uses them? Silly i know but a girl wonders.
And yes he is on hormone replacement, its not helping.

So boys and girls... it is food for thought... Maybe the old saying is true

lunazule lunazule
41-45, F
7 Responses Jan 3, 2013

Holy Moses Luna! That is scary to read. I had no idea the parts could just wither away like that. Poor bastard. Poor you! That just makes it seem all the more unlikely he will return to sexuality - unless he takes major doses of T - or something. Best of luck to you both.

He is on T but it is having no effect. He has made a choice to stay on one medication that has seriously effected his ability to perform. There are other meds but he will not go there. It is his way of avoiding the sex issue all together. If i bring it up i am just being mean. So i am getting my **** together because i refust to pass another birthday in this life.

I was talking about losing size in the penis not the testicles.

You must figure there are a lot of gullible people in this group.

And, judging by the responses, you may be partially right.

darling... do your research. There is truth in this. He has a hormonal imbalance and his testicles are not functioning properly, they are in a state of Atrophy.
And you can lose size. I did my homework befor posting this. It was a shock to me to see the marked differance from the last time he made any attempt. He is not self pleasuring, nor his he playing with me. He has no desire. Partly mental, partly physical. Don't be such a ****. Sometimes you act as if you are the all knowing and wise wizard, But honestly some times you are a pill.

Actually it can happen. It is a muscle and if you don't use it you lose it. There is a Website designed towards this. Very immature but it actually shows guys how to grow bigger and " work that area out" Called something like pegym or peworkout or something (Careful Website is kind of graphic). I am sorry Lunazule for your situation, I have not had sex (no sexual contact at all) in, well Jan 15 will be 13 months, I am currently building up to "the Talk" and I have a B plan exit strategy. I firmly believe that If a Man doesn't have sex with his wife that his "Man Card" should be taken away. "If you don't pet the Dog he will never come out from under the porch". I have started having fantasies about cheating, or thinking about a lot of the women I have been with in the past. Still I wonder, like many on here, if she is cheating on me. Don't know if I would be unhappy if she was. It would at least explain why. Just realize that I have had sex only 15 times in 3 years. Well hope things turn around for all of us on here soon..

I hope that things change for you. I have struggled with him over this for a long time. He only shows some intrest when i get emotional. This time it was a simple statement of fact. I want what i want, i need it and i am aware that he has no desire to change. I am just no longer angry at him for it. And as for the count, i am sure that i am somewhere in the same neighborhood. I have had the affairs and it only goes to reinforce that i do not want to be someones **** buddy. I want the loving relationship that should go with it.
Good luck my friend in this weary battle we call Sexless Marriage.

I suspect bazzar might not be barking up the wrong tree, on the other hand, there's some extremely odd medical conditions and syndromes out there.

Your balls aren't muscles. On the other hand if they've really stopped functioning properly, you're going to have serious sexual problems. Normally most of the excuses we hear from our spouses are pretty paper thin and simply designed to put us off for a while longer. Having your balls atrophy sounds like a nightmare, and it terrifies my inner teenager.

Im loss for words. Are you sure? Have a second look...honestly, I have never heard of a man losing both his testicles...

Wow, never heard of it! Is it really true?

What happens to monks and priests?

On a serious note, I am glad to see you all are making an attempt. Good luck.

Sounds like serious hormonal problems. Loss of girth, testicular shrinkage, low libido..... Time to talk to an endocrinologist. He may not have the oomph-la-la to get himself off to the docs, another side effect, so you may have to do all the footwork at first. These problems just sap all the fun and verve out of a man, but can be reversed. Don't take my word for it, make those appointments. (If you care....)

after several years of me begging he did have his levels checked and he is on treatment. But it does not seem to be having the desired effect. I have been caring and banging my head against the wall for years.