How Do You Handle The Future?This question is about kids. I have a 13 and a 7 year old. I used to have visions of them being happy, well adjusted, kids that would end up with spouces and grandkids for me. But somehow through the process of being in a sexless marriage, my image for them has changed. Now I would prefer that they go to college, get a nice job, find a fixer upper house that they can afford on just their income. And then if they meet someone, fine. But don't marry and make sure the house is just in their name. Then when the good doesn't outweigh the bad, they just have a conversation and part ways. Not to say that if their lover is having a bad day that they just tell them to **** off and change the locks. No, I'm saying make every effort to work it out. Then just part ways if it can't be fixed. No attorneys, forms, courts, judges, etc.
Have any of you become jaded in this way about marriage in general?
A good friend of mine told me something once. It was an old Army buddy that has passed away now. But he said in the 12 months leading up to marriage, put a penny in the jar every time you have sex. It doesn't have to be 12 months, it can be three months. And then after the wedding, you go the same period of time (12 or 3 months). But this time you take a penny out each time you have sex. At the end of the period, you will see what the difference is after you say "I do". He always said that if there were still pennies in the jar, dump her. Interesting way to look at it. I know it would have fixed my issue because the well completely dried up within weeks of her saying "I do".