I Live In a Sexless Marriage
I'm still that pathetic person who blames myself for the rejection I experience. I'm too fat, I'm too ugly, we don't have sex because he just isn't attracted to me!! The sad thing is this hasn't gone on for years just the last one, even sadder we've only been together for 2 years!!
I was married to someone for 20 years and after I had my 1st baby I had zero interest in sex, he would nag, berate me in front of others and I found I was only doing it so that he would stop nagging!! Fast forward 15 years and 1 emergency hysterectomy later I found my desire for sex returning but I wasn't attracted to my husband anymore, actually I started to feel bad for how I had treated him so I decided to divorce him!!
I got a job, my own place, dated, went out and started loving life!!
Then I met the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, we are both shift workers so we didn't see each other every day or even every other day but probably once a week, we always had sex, which was great, after a year of dating I thought it would be better to live together, we might be shift workers but seeing him once a week was just not enough for me, we moved in together and 2 months later he gave me an engagement ring....and since then the sex just became less and less...it's now 3 months since we have had it!! I've tried every trick in the book - but I get told tomorrow, which naturally never comes!!
I'm now onto my 6th night on the couch, he hasn't even said a word because he knows why!! I've said to him on numerous occasions wtf is going on? I haven't nagged or berated him, actually this is the 1st rant I've had, I feel like history is repeating itself except in reverse! He's asked me to be patient but what if he just never feels that vibe with me!! I just don't understand what happened!! He's not cheating as we spend our spare time together, he's not into Internet ****, I just think maybe alcohol has killed his libido which he naturally refuses to accept!!
It's just like he wants a housemate, a part of me wants to say I'll find it elsewhere, another part thinks if I say those words it'll be over - I don't know whose more pathetic but I sure can't help I got whacked by karma
I was married to someone for 20 years and after I had my 1st baby I had zero interest in sex, he would nag, berate me in front of others and I found I was only doing it so that he would stop nagging!! Fast forward 15 years and 1 emergency hysterectomy later I found my desire for sex returning but I wasn't attracted to my husband anymore, actually I started to feel bad for how I had treated him so I decided to divorce him!!
I got a job, my own place, dated, went out and started loving life!!
Then I met the guy I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, we are both shift workers so we didn't see each other every day or even every other day but probably once a week, we always had sex, which was great, after a year of dating I thought it would be better to live together, we might be shift workers but seeing him once a week was just not enough for me, we moved in together and 2 months later he gave me an engagement ring....and since then the sex just became less and less...it's now 3 months since we have had it!! I've tried every trick in the book - but I get told tomorrow, which naturally never comes!!
I'm now onto my 6th night on the couch, he hasn't even said a word because he knows why!! I've said to him on numerous occasions wtf is going on? I haven't nagged or berated him, actually this is the 1st rant I've had, I feel like history is repeating itself except in reverse! He's asked me to be patient but what if he just never feels that vibe with me!! I just don't understand what happened!! He's not cheating as we spend our spare time together, he's not into Internet ****, I just think maybe alcohol has killed his libido which he naturally refuses to accept!!
It's just like he wants a housemate, a part of me wants to say I'll find it elsewhere, another part thinks if I say those words it'll be over - I don't know whose more pathetic but I sure can't help I got whacked by karma
By:
MsBodhi
Age:
41-45
,
Female
