Maybe It'S Me...I haven't written for a few days now, so I thought I'd do a bit of reflecting now that the storm has passed. Puppy and I sit here in quiet, and I'm thinking. Because of the blizzard, spousal unit has missed 2 days work and we've spent more time together than we have in months. It's been fine, I guess. Probably normal ... at least. We've been able to talk about daily stuff. Work on shoveling the driveway together. It all seems very typical... so maybe it's me with unrealistic expectations.
I guess he's tried to flirt a little and get closer physically. You know, butt pats, head on my leg while watching tv, etc. I could have played into it I suppose. I'm just not interested. Nearly cringe when he touches me. He seems to be trying, at least this weekend. SO Maybe it's me.
I can't get past so many things he's done and hasn't done. I really don't trust him with my heart. Maybe I don't want to trust him. Maybe I don't want to get get past it all. Perhaps the last 15 yrs have been enough and I've given up. He's not... so maybe it is me, and maybe that's okay.