Two Sides Of A Story
If my husband was writing this it would probably sound like most of the men here. But this is my side ,I live in a sexless marriage and I know it is my fault.Or is it? When I look back at my marriage I try to pin point the events that lead us here .To an unhealthy state of maybe once or twice of not in the mood lovemaking a month.This has been going on for years.This is not us ,we were never this but this is where we are now.There are moments in your life that change you , events you never ever forget and I think after time they consume you and destroy you.What was it ? Being exposed to **** and sex at a early age, being molested by men who you looked up to ,always being looked at as an object and taken advantage of .I can say in my marriage things changed after the kids ,after my husband made me have an abortion ,that was a big one for me something died after that, a love I had for him just died,taking care of kids,home and work that is my life now . All he does is come home from work ,eat ,watch tv and then expect me to always be in the mood .We go nowhere ! Nowhere but work and church and I am suppose to be the same as when we met, when things are not the same as when we met. It does not add up to me .But I am to blame ,something must be wrong with me ! And maybe something is wrong with me . I asked him to have a bi-sectomy if he did not want more kids ,he said no so I tied my tubes .Now I am learning that low libido is a side effect.Now he asking me to consider a reversal.What a selfish man. So after all this why bother ,why try ,just give up and throw in the towel. I cant do that I love my husband and I want this to work . I want to be happy ,I want him to be happy ,I want to be not broken and tired . So I will be getting the help I need ,sounds simple just get the help but I know this will be a long journey to try and fix this. So to the other side there is always an answer to the why, but it takes time for even the one to blame to figure out the answer to that .