Valentines Day Ideas

V-Day is upon us.  May I hear a collective "Ugh!" from all of us who dread this day because our "sexless" spouses will disappoint us once again.

My question for us all is this:

If your spouse would enthusiatically agree to ANYTHING that you would like to do for Valentines Day, what would you like to do for the day?  (And yes, I understand that we all would like a day of wild passionate sex, but what else?)

What would be your perfect V-Day?

BeeAlone BeeAlone
41-45, F
25 Responses Feb 11, 2009

Oh well, here we are, Valentines Day has come and gone, and not even a kiss worth mentioning!!<br />
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Fcuk it.

I would like to spend Valentines Day with my partner and a bottle of champagne, nice meal and know at the end of the day ....well I can dream.

I can tell Valentines night will be a cracker, after suggesting the dinner, wine and poetry and getting a firm 'no', my wife asked suggested I call a mate and she if he wants to go out because I haven't seen him for a while? OMG, who said romance is dead!!!

Alymae, my husband is very controlling. . .

Rubbed! ( I know you didn't ask me, but I have never had a man cook for me in my entire life are talking about cooking right?) Just to have a man make a romantic by candlelight..... want to cuddle with me by the me poetry.......and of course...... the sex, sex and MORE sex part. That would be a great valentines day. <br />
Instead, I will fix dinner for my husband, he might get me a card might not, he will say "happy valentines day babe" and kiss my cheek before he goes to sleep, and I will cry a little...........then early Sunday morning I will get up and leave for vacation with my sister. There is a reason my vacation is scheduled for the day after V Day. (disaster recovery program) <br />
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He has been trying lately, but I have NO expectaions for V Day. Tonight I told him I would give him anything he wanted for V-Day and he dodged the subject. That pretty much says it all.

I'm sorry... but I have to say sex, sex and more sex. <br />
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I agree with BeMySelf's idea. <br />
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Regarding:<br />
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As long as he parks his "control car", we get along very well, outside of SEX. After so many years we are comfortable together and I consider him a friend when we are in the outer world. <br />
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My husband is also this a common theme for women in our group?

BeeAlone - how do you like your meat? Rubbed or marinated?

So I can't be disappointed, I brought Valentine’s Day forward to tomorrow, then I have no expectations! I'm in denial as you can tell :)<br />
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I have arranged babysitters to look after the kids and bought tickets for an early Murder Mystery Evening, that should be finished by 9PM and then we are off to one of our favourite restaurants for dinner at 9:30 until late.<br />
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There will be no sex for desert because my wife will be tired or full from dinner, the usual, but I don't care about that, I will still enjoy the evening for what it is.<br />
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But in response to your original question (I do tend go off in tangents), I have agreed to paint the house on Saturday, but I suggested what would have been my perfect Valentines for Saturday evening; we get the kids off to bed early, I cook something delicious, light a roaring log fire in the living room, we open a bottle or two of wine and read some romantic poetry (okay, the poetry maybe doesn't sound like a bundle of laughs, but I think it's all about what you make of it :), anyhow, that got a resounding no from the wife?<br />
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So if anyone else wants to share Valentines, I could dig out something nice from Keats, Shelley or Byron after my wife has gone to bed on Saturday night!!<br />
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Keep smiling and the world smiles with you! What a load of pants!!

I am going to grab him by the collar and tell him what he is going to do for me...... Use you imagination...<br />
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My marriage isnt totally sexless, I just have to force him! LOL!

Your killing me!!!!!

BeeAlone - Tony's with a special rub for the meat!

if "my spouse would agree to ANYTHING I wanted for Valentines day"- Man, what a question. My thoughts range from requesting her to f*** off out of my life, to performing all sorts of carnal activities with her !!!<br />
Talk about extremes !!<br />
In reality tho, the day is of no significance to a "Financial Partner". That is one of the great benefits of recognising the reality of a sexless 'marriage', namely that when you dispense with the role of "Husband" and have no expectations what so ever of "Wife" it is not a date one needs to attach any significance to, or requiring any action at all. <br />
In a spousal situation, this day, or any other excuse you can think of, ought be used to bonk each other vigorously and imaginatively. Good luck to those in that situation.<br />
I think it will be me and my hand here !!!!!!

Sexless, tell me that you shopped at Tony's Meat Market and make me homesick for CO!

I like to cook and I have an amazing dinner planned for me and Rosey. <br><br />
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I am going to marinate Felete mingots, smoke them in the smoker. Find some organic asperigus and smoke it in an olive oil and garlic sauce. Make fresh whole wheat bread from scratch and a great salad.<br><br />
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For desert I am baking an oatmeal cinimon cake with a crumb topping.<br><br />
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We will have a bottle of Ausie wine.<br><br />
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After dinner we will take a walk around the lake and watch the ducks.<br><br />
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Then we will come inside and cuddle on the couch. I will open a fresh bottle of KY, flip open the laptop, and watch **** and consummate the evening with my best friend - Rosey Palm

Reflections..I identify totally and relate with you. We live parallel lives.

We both enjoy Vegas so maybe start the day sleeping in with something fun in the afternoon. Dress up for a really nice dinner and a show maybe find a lounge with some nice music after and to complete the day well you all know.<br />
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We have seperate activities during the day this year. Not on purpose though but will go out for a nice dinner.<br />
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reflection3, about half as many years but I can relate to being comfortable.

Sorry to disappoint but I don't care for V Day (am I a man's dream or what? :-) lololol). <br />
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I am actually getting excited for the party my little one is having at preschool for Valentines Day; we signed cards together, has a cute outfit, they will have treats etc. <br />
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Me? I will have some errands to run which will end by 5pm and all I want is to do next is nothing....relax, have a couple drinks, watch TV and ...sleep. I am no fun, I know.

We are going down to Amish Country in Lancaster, PA ... we love to visit that part of PA and the winter has been too long with too much snow. <br><br />
Even though we had a huge fight last week, neither one of us wants to cancel our trip together.<br><br />
As long as he parks his "control car", we get along very well, outside of SEX. After so many years we are comfortable together and I consider him a friend when we are in the outer world. <br><br />
Can anybody relate to this relationship I have now after 40 years in a sexless marriage!?!? <br><br />
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Blehh.. I feel for you. Hope it isn't contentious that just makes things more difficult. Sorry to see this happening to you you seem a woman of great heart, passion and spirit.

Double UGH from me. <br />
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I just asked for a divorce last weekend.. and he's coming home for Valentine's weekend...which means I can't spend it with someone I COULD actually be having a romantic, sex filled day with. <br />
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Instead I'll be spending it discussing the terms of our divorce and reminding him of all the reasons it will NOT work for us to stay together no matter how much he loves me.

UGH!<br />
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He has a big project on at work so said to me mid January - "I'll probably forget valentines day so don't get mad when I do, ok?"<br />
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Not surprisingly this was not followed by a suggestion/promise that we'd do something when his project is over.<br />
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I really wouldn't want much - a walk on the beach, a nice meal, actually spending some time together. Maybe some actual romantic gesture. Not that I don't appreciate the computer memory he bought me as an early valentines gift to get it out of the way but a single red rose would be lovely. <br />
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And lot's of hot sex of course!

Of all the manufactured retail holidays, Valentines Day is the worst. It is illusionary and pre supposes that all things purchased are in themselves an ex<x>pression of love and adoration. This may mean something to the very young but to most of here who have seen what love or the lack of love can do it is not a pleasant day. <br />
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Halloween is a far more fitting holiday for those of us in sexless marriages because it is more in keeping with what we all do year long . We dressup and become some one that is not really us. Its make believe time day after day. <br />
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It is only here that I can feel comfortable enough to remove my mask.

I have told my husband already that I want my 17 year old step-son to watch the younger boys. I want to check into a nice hotel and have wine and strawberries and I would wear my costume I bought for his birthday four months ago, that he never saw, because, you guessed it, we never even got close to sex. It is a white and pink " innocent virgin type" I wanted our first time in two years to be, well like we were virgins again. Anyway, we would make slow passionate love and afterwards go out to dinner somewhere nice and romantic, like the Keg and then you know, come home to the kids. Of course, this will most likely not happen as something has come up with my vehicle that requires a lot of money, and as usual we will not have any money left for any kind of date.

I almost hate the day as much as I hate the constant Teddy-gram and Pajama-gram commercials!