4 Months and Counting

I live in a sexless marriage, it has now been 4 months and 2 weeks since we last had sex. Even before then it was about 1 a month and very mechanical. She would ****** then it was my turn and that was it. A lot has definately changed from when we met and started having sex. She was very unhibitied, tried many things and we had sex almost every day. Now even before the drought, it has only been like 1 a month. She doesn't seem that into it and i feel like at times she may be having sex with someone else.  I think she did have an affair on me 5 years ago. Things were not clicking, her boss was going on a lot of trips with here and I saw email where she would invite him to lunch or meet for breakfast, She says recently it was only a crush nothing more, then i saw a picture a year ago on her phone where she had taken a picture of her butt(clothed) and sent it to someone she works with in another state. A state she visits for work 2 or 3 times a year. There were a lot of restricted calls as well showing up under her number. So I feel she has had or is having another affair. Though she says she loves me and we have a 3 year old toghether. I think this probably keeps us together and the child is definately her priority. Feel like she is just not that into me, passionately and at times I just say whatever and go on. It got to the point last year I went and had a sensual body massage for the main reason for having someone pay attention to me. Not a good choice I know, but I did. Any way that is part of my story and I think we need to communicate better and talk this out ,but both of us just seem too busy and pre-occupied with other things to care. 

mick59 mick59
56-60, M
3 Responses Feb 16, 2009

have any good ways to snoop on her to see if she could possibly be having an affair

i know exactly where you're coming from. its not just the sex I (we) need and want - which is a big deal - bu also the intimacy - the touching, tenderness, etc.

I could write a story just like that . When we first met she would B all over me . Then after she had our 3RD it all over . It was as if I had 2 rape her than so I just gave up 7 years with out sex . I could live with sharing but she never seamed 2 want 2 try that . So I use my PLASTIC PANTS 2 keep sane !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!