I Live In a Sexless and a Silent Marriage.

My second marriage, of eleven years is in the gutter. Not for the usual issues, an affair or money problems, but because we disagreed on raising kids, in particular, my two kids from my previous marriage. This marriage and my blended family crashed for no good reason. My kids are gone, off to college. Her one kid (age 23 and older than mine) still lives in our basement.

The trust and intimacy went out the window about seven years ago. Decay set in and now there is no relationship at all. There has been silence in my house since December of last year. Every morning I say "good morning" to her. No reply. Every evening I come home and say "Hello." No reply. The only time she speaks to me is when she has a question; "Did you feed the dogs tonight?" or "Did you pay this bill?"

It is lonely around here.

I like to party. I like to sing and dance and celebrate, just because. Instead, I come home and feel depressed and trapped. I hang out in my basement, read books, browse the Internet news and join groups like this looking for camaraderie.

She stays upstairs and plays christian music every night. It bores me to tears.

I want to hear The Rolling Stones, U2 and The Eagles.

She likes Michael W. Smith (yawn).

I want sex.

She wants distance.

I reach out to touch her and hold her hand.

She pulls away.

The light and laughter in this house is no more.

bloke99 bloke99
46-50, M
2 Responses Aug 16, 2007

I agree with Oly, I wish I could send you a hug! There has to be give and take...equally. You want to give but there is no taking and visa versa. You are not alone out there. this site is helping deal with me knowing there are others out there

Hope you understand that I should NOT be giving advise as I cant fix my own marriage --But a MC told me to fix myself FIRST -- sounds like you are getting really depressed listening to junk music and hiding in the basement which is NOT helping YOU . I know this is hard to do but maybe if you could do your own thing for a bit you might clear your head . Marriage is a 100 / 100 percent deal --both sides need to give 100 percent --she is not