Promises Promises

We have been discussing it in therapy for 18 months now and nothing ever changes. I want it, she doesn't - not because she doesn't want sex, just not willing to actually do it with me.

At least your wife is talking to a professional. I have brought up the idea of talking to someone,she flat out says no.

So lets see ... togetherbutalone has been 18 months with a wife that won't have sex with him. The obvious conclusion is she must be getting it elsewhere the way you stated it. And Mrlonely has a wife that won't change and wont even talk to someone. The same question to both of you "Gentlemen why are you married to women who do not want you?"

Be thankful you can still count in weeks. it's been almost ten years here. i say if you have that foundation. the love, the support for each other, you can weather almost anything. And don't assume that because she's not wanting sex with you that's she's getting it from somewhere else. that's not always the case. Men and women are harder to understand than what is seen on the surface. something may be happening to her that she can't reveal to you.
on the other hand, do you take the time to stoke the fire? women, and i should know, i am one, can't just get in the mood. they need the fires of their desore stoked. Do you tell her she's beautiful, that you love her. when it comes to being intimate is your only outcome sex? Or are you content to hold and caress each other? I'll tell you, I miss sex, I really do, but it's the intimacy that I truely miss the most. Most women will tell you they would rather have hours of foreplay than five minutes of sex. Like I said, it's been almost 10 years for me, but I love my husband. I made a committment for richer for poorer, in sickness and in health, 'til death do we part. It puts things in perspective. stay strong for each other.

Winny, are you actually suggesting that you are "weathering" things together in your marriage? Sorry, but you seem to have your definitions all wrong. There is no such thing as a 10-year storm anywhere in nature.

The name of what you actually have... martyrdom.

Winny, you said it quite well. The little girl that was raised to believe is still wanting to be acccepted I guess.They are wo nderful, except.... I know. I am her too. Pink, a bit harsh, but we sometimes do need a slap of reality. Thanks to both

Winny, you said it quite well. The little girl that was raised to believe is still wanting to be acccepted I guess.They are wo nderful, except.... I know. I am her too. Pink, a bit harsh, but we sometimes do need a slap of reality. Thanks to both

I know what its like. wife has no sex drive(menapausal)she dont want no body