Wife Never Wanted Me

As soon as we got married, sex stopped.  It was like she just wanted to be married and faked it during premarriage, but as soon as she felt securely married she wanted nothing to do with me.   Always too busy, too tired etc.  It isn't just sex either.  She says no to everything.  Do you want to go for a hike? NO.  Want to go canoeing? NO. Want to go out to eat? NO   etc. etc.

   I usd to talk to her about but all I got were eitherexcuses or she just denied that she did this, afer 20 years ( yes 20 damn years) I just gave up and acceptted the fact that I'll always be alone.   


I had an affair for 5 years that was great until she was caught.  Now alone again.    

I'm 5' 11" and 165 and women always found me attractive until I married her.

She was very promiscous before marriage (I only learned this after we were married).

relink relink
51-55, M
5 Responses Feb 26, 2010

Run, Run, as fast as you can. I have to admit I got caught up in the same thing....I was very insecure, was so thrilled that someone really liked me, We got married, not really my idea, and after that everything started heading downhill...2 children later and probably multiple affairs on her part, I still remember the night I threw her cell phone across the back yard and told her to get the F&%K out. That day, I took back my life. It cost me every cent I had, but was still worth it in the long run. Being alone is not the end of the world, it is the beginning...slowly but surely, I am getting my life back.

There is no price you can ever set on your wasted years in relationship where no affection or intimacy existed. No one would knowingly buy into this scenario if it was akin to a product on a retail shelf at any price. Of that I am sure.<br />
<br />
If there is now some cost involved in ending this , it could be the best decision and investment you will ever make.Your children in time will understand as they too mature and find out that life is not always pure pleasure.<br />
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I wish you well in this and you have my complte empahty.

ReLink, <br />
May I make the following recommendations: <br />
1) be grateful that you can afford to leave her <br />
2) have faith that your children -- who seem old enough, by the way -- will respect you if you bluntly tell them the exact same truth you just wrote up above in your main post.

I should get a divorce, that's true and obvious. Two problems with that, first I have a good relationship with my 2 kids and don't want to screw that up and second, I've made a lot of money and it just ****** me off that she'd take half after being an *** to me for 30 years. Never the less, divorce is probably in the future after my youngest goes to college.

since she promiscuos before ,could she have been after you married? my sister was and still is and when my ex and i were married we never had sex,he was to tired etc. because he was screwing everyone else includeing the babysitter,and a co worker...been there done that and it sux,as much as it hurts you should move on you deserve to be happy