I Am Passionate And Love Sex But Hubby Won't

I know I've become quite the ***** in our marriage... and there is no excuse.. but it is simply a fact.  I live with a man who says he loves me and is attracted to me... but the truth is... we have NO relationship... absolutely NONE at all.  I try, and have tried for 10 years... but it's gone.. there are NO feelings left.. no love... NOTHING... I live with an emotionless man.

Nothing, I mean nothing gets a response from him - verbal or otherwise.  I have cried and tried, and cried and tried some more.  I have begged - and cried and pled for him to share something, anything, nothing... but nothing.

I am a VERY passionate person.. love to laugh - I am VERY< VERY funny.  I am spontaneous - and yes; I'm a bit overweight.. but I'm a hell of a lover... a fantastic mother.. and WAS a pretty good wife for many years... but after 10 years of NEGLECT I have finally come to the realization that I am totally DEAD... dead, dead.  I have no feelings inside for my husband... I don't love him and I don't even LIKE him anymore.

It may NOT be his fault... I AM NOT BLAMING HIM... BUT IT'S OVER.

I am not sad about it anymore... I am just craving for love, for a touch, a compliment... anything.  I have to DRAG compliments out of him after cooking a marvellous meal... I have driven 4 hours with this man to a hockey tournament.. and he has not said ONE word the entire trip.  He won't play music on the stereo... doesn't have a favorite song, or station or even TYPE of music.

What the HELL did I do... well I'll tell you... I rebounded after I lost the first and only TRUE love of my life through HIS multiple affairs.  Yes, I rebounded... I should never have married again.. but I was lonely... and well... couldn't do it alone.

So now, almost 10 years later (truth is I don't even know how long cause it just doesn't matter - imagine that "a woman who doesn't know how long she's been married?" - do you get it now.

I am a terrific person... absolutely adored by many people... and not one of them understands why I am in this loveless, marriage... (not very many people know this.. but they DO know that I'm not happy... and NOT being HAPPY is NOT me...  

I have only had sex maybe 10 times in the past 4 years... and it's not for lack of trying... I've asked, begged, seduced... nothing...

It's over.. I've been turned down for the last time... I want to fall in love again... to be touched, caressed... slapped on the *** when I'm in the kitchen... kissed on the neck... told dirty jokes... taken dancing... ****.. even just talk to me... pretend I"m sexy or something.

I am dying, I am dead, I am sad... I want to live again.. and "damn it" - some how I'm going to...

 

thanks for listening...   did I mention I'm a red head... yup - spontaneous, funny.. and rarely had an unspoken thought.... 

 

Gonna read some stories here for a bit.. then go to my cold, lonely, bed !!!

 

 

wannabemeagain wannabemeagain
46-50
5 Responses Mar 10, 2010

Sounds like you need a good, long, hard f*cking.....twice

Sounded as if I wrote this story. We deserve better. I like you refuse to belive that I have to live the rest of my life like this. In a relationship like this being a "*****" is learned behavior. We have learned from the master of the jerks we live with.

Your husband is obviously uncaring of your needs.Has your husband seen a doctor?Maybe his low libido is due to some medical problem?No one deserves to endure being neglected this way in a marriage or multiple affairs(from your first).Try finding something you enjoy,can get passionate about,active with and be fulfilled doing.It has a way of bringing a persons spirit to life,growth and a great way to meet interest new people.Show him you will live a fulfilling life with or without him and he can enjoy his hockey alone.Perhaps that will spark something in him or prepare you for better things ahead in life.Good luck

Can I just say wow I love you! You are packing the heat about time you get some back! Hugs to you hot momma!!!

Find a way to walk away. Take time for you first then make yourself available to be in a relationship. I went celibate for 3 years after my second divorce - I did not want to have a rebound relationship or affair. Cleared my mind and heart so I would be more aware of what I wanted in a man. I almost got it all and am now trying to decide if what I have is enough. Good luck.....