Some People Are Just Idiots

So I wrote a story and then some one asked well maybe it is your fault, maybe blah blah blah..... Are they really that dumb? It isn't bad enough that we are constantly wondering what the hell we are doing wrong that our spouses aren't attracted to us? Does some one else really need to voice our insecurities, our depths of hell we live in everyday? Honestly what the hell are they thinking? It makes me so pissed.... My husband told me I needed to lose weight I did, but since I am 5'6" I refuse to weigh less than 100 lbs. Still he kept telling me to lose weight. He said I wasn't that into it... So no matter how he was hurting me or how awful it was I acted like it was really great and he completely fell for it, He thinks he is the worlds best lover and that I am just way too horny. So I got action for the first time in 3 weeks, two days ago and his excuse for not having sex with me yesterday... "but honey we had sex yesterday..." What the hell? Is there really something wrong with having sex 2 days in a row? My God did I marry an Idiot? Anyway I can't sleep so I am ranting and raving and thinking hell yes I'll leave... knowing that it isn't going to happen, because tonight he just wanted to cuddle, and hang out with me.... This hasn't happened for a while and it was so nice.... and those moments I would really miss if I left him right now... Of course I am still working on the whole contingency plan.... because that day may come, and so if it does....

So here is something I wrote a while back and put up as blog rather than an experience not realizing the difference....

I really should be happy, I am safe secure and have food. No one hits me, and I have it better than 80% of the world... So why aren't I? why does sex matter so much? today is vday... so he ****** me because he didn't get me anything else... it hurt like hell and for the first time I told him how bad it sucked... He rammed in at a bad angle and now I hurt so much I can barely walk... He doesn't really care... A couple weeks ago he went to a  ***** club... then when he confessed On Vday, told me I really suck at stripping "You just don't seem that into it..." He got a ***** at the ***** club but not when I ***** for him.... I have just stopped trying sexually and now I am getting a bit more sex and it is all bad... I think maybe I should just be a lesbian...  hmmm.... it's an option

So rather than being a lesbian... I am taking stip classes... Pole classes..... Maybe if I get good then he'll get a *****... Wish me luck

boredbedroom boredbedroom
26-30, F
5 Responses Mar 14, 2010

boredbedroom,<br />
<br />
Your husband said "but honey we only had sex yesterday" <br />
<br />
I remember many years ago when my father was about 50 he said to me that he found it strange that not everyone wanted to make love every morning and every night! He said surely everyone is capable of wanting that. So such a lot of us are simply married to someone on the other side of the sexual spectrum.

I don't think pole dancing classes are going to help you with your husband. Take them for fun, take them to feel sexy, but I feel that he will find something else "wrong" in order to put the blame on you. <br />
He seems to like making you feel bad and insecure.

The whole saying once burned twice shy.... I pressed charges against my dad at 14 for sexual abuse... the fall out from that was more than I could take... There is still fallout from it... anyway, I think a divorce would have that same type of kaplooeyism... so I am pretty much terrified of it.... and besides that I love him, (outside the bedroom at least)

If you re-read your stories, do your husband's actions and attitudes sound like those of someone who loves you? It doesn't sound like it to me. You are very young, and you have your whole life ahead of you. Please give serious thought to what the future might hold for you. It's good to hear that you are working on a "contingency plan".

Good luck... <br />
<br />
And here's a hug for all your pain... I know what you are suffering from. I don't know what you DH's problem is, but I know from the sounds of it he is not only neglectful and rejecting, but he is cruel about it too. He is a 100% sex abuser. <br />
<br />
I really give you all my sympathy.<br />
<br />
hugs<br />
james<br />