Acopy Of A Letter To My Family

Here it is my EP friends:
Well gang the cat came out of the bag. I have been trying to develop an exit stategy for my marriage for a couple of months now. I met some woman online but that was at least several weeks before I had made a frim decision to divorce no matter what the cost. She lives in Ontario and I have no idea where our relationship will go. Lets just say we deal with many of the same issues. Anyway I made the mistake of leaving my cell phone unguarded and ***** saw my call history. I only got her cell number last week but that doesn't matter. When she demanded to know who this was i told her it was some woman I met online but I am planning to divorce you. I told her today even thogh she did not want to hear it that i had decided to divorce before I started the relationship with this woman.
She told me I can have the house which saves me the time of looking for a place to live. She isn't sure what she wants to do yet aside from moving out. I will have to get a part time job, her heath plan will cost me about about 440-450 a month alone but I am sure I can cut back on expenses without her bad spending habits to deal with. I have a mountain of financial records to sort through and school to do but at least the end is in sight.
Feel free to email me at this adress or on facebbok as i have changed all of my passwords as well as the password on my laptop.
OmyTVC15 OmyTVC15
51-55, M
5 Responses Feb 9, 2012

My advice is to take the blame out of the process. say that it simply doesn't work anymore, that neither person is to blame for being who they have come to be. That you simply want something better for both of you. It is hard to argue with someone who accepts equal culpability for a relationship gone wrong. Borderline personality disorder makes it more difficult as they perceive abandonment and betrayal at the slightest problem, but try this tact, it might help.

Is there are group here for mental health is affecting my marriage?

Oh I feel for u I know how unsteady she can b. Cuz I work with m.l. With p.t.s.d. . If ur sons r grown they may already know don't sell em short. But u may wanna talk to them anyway.

Oh I feel for u I know how unsteady she can b. Cuz I work with m.l. With p.t.s.d. . If ur sons r grown they may already know don't sell em short. But u may wanna talk to them anyway.

My son was begging me to "find out what is wrong with mom" when I was in counseling for depression about 7 or 8 years ago, he was about 14 at the time. I mentioned her symptoms to my counselor and after she met my wife duing one of my sessions and my wife had a full blown episode right in her office she got together with her staff and they came up with borderline personality disorder. I have since joined an online group of people that deal with borderlines and have confirmed that her behavior matches a borderline dianosis. My son told my wife and she got real mad about it and my life hasn't been the same since, not that it wasn't a mess before that. Severe mental illness is bad enough to have to deal with by itself but the fact that few people understand it make it even worse. Of course my wife has no idea why I am divorcing her. She doesn't think there is anything wrong with her and until everything is final I and my son have to live with her. My yoonger son knows as well he is 17 now and my older son who lives out of state is going to turn 22 this summer.

Wow, is right¡¡¡¡ well take a deep.breath its almost over. Will.keep.checking on u

Everyone since is telling me how wrong I was to keep it from her and tell my sons in advance. They didn't know how unpredictable her behavior was.