I am 29 and have been with my boyfriend for four and a half years.
This year, we have had sex no more than 3 times!
In other ways, our relationship is perfect + strong. But I don't know what to do anymore - I feel I must now leave, but don't want to hurt him.
We have spoken about it, but it never gets better, in fact only worse. In the beginning, we had sex about once a week+ it was often me that initiated it.
He says he is not gay, not having an affair and that it has never been a problem for him before. I don't know what it can be then?
When we get into bed and he is suddenly so tired, I know he is just making sure I don't try anything. The whole year I have felt like I am going crazy, wondering what is so unattractive about me. Weirdly enough, last month, four men expressed interest in me, so I know I can't be too unattractive.
Perhaps he no longer loves me? But why does he say he does - and that he wants to spend his life with me?
My insides feel like a dry husk, all the pain,rejection and anguish have given way to sorrow and hopelessness.
Everything is ok until I try to bring up the subject. he just apologizes, but then seems to ignore it until the next time I bring it up - it makes me so angry that he never mentions it. I feel like the needy, desperate person when I do.
This is really disjointed and badly written, sorry! Am just so happy to have found "someone" to talk to.