Lost And In Love

I have been dating a girl for a year. She is a 29 year old virgin from south america. not a hard core bible thumper, but a Christian. She believes that sex should wait till marriage.

When we first met, she was very physical, we would get mostly naked. touching, kissing, loving on each other without actual sex. We have moved into the i love you stage of a relationship and have connected to well that we have talked about Marriage, buying homes, living our lives with each other. we feel we connect better than any previous relationship in our pasts and cant get enough of each other. On the flip side, it is virtually impossible for her to even make out with me let alone get a little more physical in bed. I respect and understand her choices of sex before marriage. but now i cant get a decent kiss. our physical part of life is non-existent except for the hello and good bye kiss. I truly want to marry this woman. no woman has ever understood me more. but am no where CLOSE to being satisfied with her physical attention to me. i feel ugly, unwanted and lonely. i don't want to get into a marriage if i know I'm not going to have a woman who is as attracted to me physically as she is mentally. not sure what to do. i love her to death and am willing to do anything to try and help and better someone she wants to be with.

cvbud cvbud 26-30, M 5 Responses Nov 21, 2009

Your Response


MmMmMmM It is very clear to me she loves u a lot but loves God more than u do. In the past she used to have sexual exchanges with u because the attraction was such that she neglected her relation with God. Once she realized that God is her first and that he is the love of her life , the one who gave her u... all she can do is being grateful for what he gave her in her past and present and have decided to make things right and to make better her relation with him. Please do not put her between this.... just marry her ask her hand. She is between u and God while if u marry her she can please u both. she would like to please u am sure but pleasing u would be again being sinful to God the king of king. is she make love with u gain instead of feeling close to u she will feel u dont understand her because u are trying to make her sin when u could help her by marrying her. Dont close ur mind and think and ask urself; HOW could she not love u if u are the best relation she have had.... how could she not love u if she has hurt her relation with God at first just to show u how much u like her even when she thinks it is sinful... how could she not love u for ur physic is ur soul is what she wants and romantic love overcomes physical one? it is just that she cant convince God of allowing her having sex with u... but she can convince u of marrying with her and be happy all.... God and u are her biggest lovers but tooooo different love to compare... but if she has to choose I guess she would choose God because she cant help in not being able to convince God but u can help by marrying her..... not be unsure she loves u man..... dont be close!

I do hope your not heading for the ILIASM group, is the writing on the wall?

i think she was kissing u first not anymore.......soooo i think she wants u to ask her hand....i mean she had her intimacy time with you, when u were touching, then u talked about marriage...HELLOOOOOOOO....then she keep seeing u but saying she cant do it before marriage....

MAN ASK HER HAND!!! its obvious. u were scared too much that she doesnt feel attracted to you, and u forgot that she used to touch u, but she feels guilt about it since her religion stop her.....

ASK HER HAND .....thats the answer

It won't get better after marriage. The pattern of intimacy has been established by her and you have no say in it whatsoever. It all sounds very one-way to me. So the question is: Is she willing to do whatever it takes to be with you too.

Talk to her. If she wants to get married b4 then book a wedding. If she really loves you then she won't care how big the wedding is.