P/a Man

The man with this type of pattern shows little consideration of the time, feelings, standards or needs of others.

He obstructs and block progress to others getting what they want and then ignores or minimalizes their dissatisfactions and anger.
He is silent when confronted as he has never learned to compromise. He may be a workaholic, a womanizer, hooked on TV, caught in addictions or self-involved hobbies.


These people are usually unaware that the difficulties they encounter in their life are the result of their own behavior. They do not connect their passive resistant behavior to the hostility or resentment other people feel towards them. Dealing with passive aggressive people can be crazymaking. You feel dismissed, shut down, ignored… but in a subtle enough way that you don’t know how to react. At some point, you explode.


westsideblues1 westsideblues1
56-60, F
4 Responses Sep 11, 2012

This is the man I'm married to!!! :(

All kidding aside, maybe he has Asperger's. My ex wife does but I only found out after she completely wrecked our marriage.

Unbelievably accurate!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

gypsyblu, are you secretly living in my home? LOL Let's see, he's a 100% workaholic, addicted to tv & sports. TV MUST be on ALL the time...loud. And it must be on sports ALL the time. I have thought about this and have come up with this possibility; Work keeps him busy, gone and unable to give me what I want, closeness, time, intimacy. He knows I have zero interest in sports, so that keeps me from even watching tv with him. It's so loud that I end up leaving that part of the home and he doesn't have to deal with me. If I ask that we go do something, it's always the most important game coming on. I used to accuse him of being a bore, but now I recognize it as a tactic. His life has been designed to keep me out.
If I ask for something, I ALWAYS end up saying, "By the timeI get what I've asked for, I don't want it anymore. The attraction is gone because of what I have had to go through to get it." Two things are a sure wreck to my plans; #1 If I give him enough notice/time before the event, there is a 100% guarantee he will somehow sabbotage the plans. #2 If I give him access to, or power over the event, it's wrecked. Now he does this in very ambiguous, covert, vague ways. On the outside it may look innocent or out of his control. But on careful inspection, his PA fingerprints are all over the disappointing outcome.

yep my p/a has the TV on all the time and just like your p/a mine has to have it way loud!!! I keep asking him to turn it down...

yes, my p/a keeps me out of his life by not participating in my life... he sits and watches TV all day and trolls on the p/c then off to bed. no wonder he had a heart attack, sitting all day, year after year is a recipe for major heart /att