Patience Forever

Carol's loved to dance. I was 19 and starting a life in the military. We met on the eve of election day in 1984. She wondered why I did not comment on her expensive perfume (her mother's). Days later I explained I had congenital anosmia, hence I was born lacking the ability to smell. We married 5 months later and had 3 great kids. Twenty years in the military and I retired, but still needed to work. The year of my retirement, Carol needed a knee replacement surgery and it seemed to go well. It was a very painful surgery, but she seemed to be recovering nicely. A small infection on her toe spread to her knee and infected it. The infection got deep into the knee and finally after 3 years of chronic pain, an ortho surgeon performed a 2-stage surgery, removing the artificial knee, and replacing it with a hockey puck filled with antibiotics. Then, after 3 weeks he put in her new knee. But, 3 weeks was not long enough. Months after that 2nd knee replacement surgery, her infection was back and causing a lot of pain. She was constantly on antibiotics, sometimes even on IV antibiotics in the hospital or even at home. Finally, a doctor did a 3rd knee replacement surgery. He advised that 3 weeks was not enough, so this time the knee was left out for 12 weeks. The pain Carol endured was more than I could stand. At one point I called a help line just to speak to someone anonymous about my frustration with the doctors and the lack of adequate pain management for my wife. Over the years, some doctors made terrible accusations and showed disgusting lack of compassion, but some showed great intelligence and compassion. Since her 3rd knee surgery about 10 months ago, Carol has been in constant pain that is not improving. She spends her time crying in pain or drugged and sleeping. I am alone or with a drugged child-like spouse who needs constant supervision due to the strength of the drugs. I want the doctors to help her, but they do not seem to care or have any answers. I think they don't really care.
PatienceForever PatienceForever
Sep 25, 2012