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2 Bipolar People In My Life

I have 2 stories. One is successful and the other not. I met my ex at 18 and we married at 21. He began to show signs of the disease but even as a nurse love
is blind. I worked while he went to med school and became a doctor. He was self medicating all the while with drugs of every sort  on the sly for years. I begged him to go to a psychiatrist but he would not-ever. He liked the mania too much. He developed many other mental disorders over the past 30 years because he only thinks he needs to stay sober now. He lost many great positions and ailienated his family after he left us. He has been married many times,been arrested for sexual indecent behavior and has ruined is life.

The next story is about our daughter that also is bipolar. Fortunately her dad was not in her life much since he left 29 years ago. I view pschiatry like any other medical field and got her help asap after she started to have problems at16 years old. She did not have a taboo against mental problems like her dad does. Once diagnosed with BP disorder and after 4 years of finding the best drug combo she is more "normal" than most people. The thing is she got help and took her meds religiously and allowed me to help during the process. She is a successful classical Musician,attends Harvard grad school and no one has a clue she is bipolar. She takes her meds always because she says she does not want to turn out like her father. So there is a sliver lining to every cloud. God Bless and Hope for all affected by this genetic disease.

gbingvd gbingvd 51-55 3 Responses Jun 18, 2010

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I am so thankful to read your story. However, I am incredibly saddened by your statement that 'no one has a clue she is bipolar'. I find this sad on the basis that I haven't heard anyone say, 'no one has a clue she is cancer.', 'she is migraines', 'she is diabetic', etc. As a strong, educated woman who HAS a disorder called Bipolar type 1, I simply have a disease. A disorder, chemical imbalance, a small hinderence. The best thing anyone who as a support person for a person who HAS a mental illness can do is to impress upon them that they are not their disease/disorder. They are people, who are capable of beauty, worth, value and strength to be shared because they fight this gnarly fight. I have fired several doctors who have said the "You are bipolar.......". Because I refuse to be THAT. I am a mother, a wife, a friend, a daughter, a college grad. Please understand the effects the statement you made can have to people searching for help.........

how inspirational! I had a similar experience only w my mom! She's a manic gambling addict who refuses treatment and is destroying herself. She never divulged any family history or maybe was not aware of any. I finally pieced the puzzle together with my first manic episode at 21 and my brothers' and my drug problems, impulsivity, irritation, indecisiveness, depression, artistic talent, creativity etc. all made sense! lol. ( Now, looking back, everything makes sense. My first onset of depression was at 13, and first psychotic symptoms at 16 during my parents' divorce).<br />
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My mom has little emotional involvement in my life and usually calls just to ***** about her life. We pretty much have no relationship anymore and it's sad. But at the end of the day, I woke up on morning and said "my behavior isn't normal. I need treatment." And no one else can really do that for you.<br />
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I am wrapping up undergrad research and applying to graduate schools right now for clinical psychology. I sometimes fear that I may relapse in grad school from stress. Like your husband, I crave the mania because I can write a 20-page thesis in a day or two and get an A+. But as you said, it is EXTREMELY unhealthy, especially to the loved ones in your life.<br />
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I adhere to my medication as does your daughter, but sometimes it saddens me to know that others will never looks at me as "normal." Most people don't know I'm bipolar, but they think I'm eccentric or quirky. Although I would hate to be average, and it is difficult to define what is normative, it still hurts very much to feel as though you will never belong. To be human is to be social, and social relationships are one of the most difficult hurdles to overcome in people who suffer form bipolar disorder.<br />
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It is so inspirational to hear about successful, talented bipolar people making profound contributions to society =)

Wow can't believe you went through all that, I had my X bascially run away after being finally diagnosed with a personality disorder, Also stood by him for years and got no thanks... Happy to hear though that your daughter is doing so well.