Handling Unmedicated Ocd + Bipolar Boyfriend?

I have no where else to go to for advice, so i'm reaching out to some in this community.
My boyfriend is a walking billboard (Others would say warning sign...) for mental health issues. He has a long, long history of self-injury, suicidal tendencies, OCD, Insomnia, Depression, and -although I am unsure- I believe he also has Bipolar Disorder. He is supposed to take medication for these things, but refuses to admit that he has any issues. I have been reading extensively the last few days for a possible cause to his behaviors, and after reading about people wtih bipolar partners I found myself thinking, 'There are a lot of people in a relationship with my boyfriend...'. I love this man with all of my heart, and although he is impossible at times, I know he loves me as well. I am very prepared for a life of dealing with him and his illnesses, and I know that it is not going to be an easy road to traverse- it hasn't been. He can be egotistical to an extreme (Never wrong), Controlling (Down to what I wear, even at home, etc.) and his OCD drives him to drill me constantly about my sexual past, which triggers his episodes of extreme depression, suicidal thoughts, and anger. He blames me his anger sometimes, and often nothing is good enough. I could go into details but that is unnecessary. I attribute these behaviors to his illnesses and lack of medication. I cannot talk about these things with anyone I know, because they cannot understand the complexity, or understand where either of us are coming from.  I am learning as I go, but it is tough. Like I have said, I am prepared for my life with him- I know that I cannot have him without his illnesses. They go hand in hand and I love him enough to try and work this out.
How can I talk to him about possibly taking his medication without sending him into an episode?
Any tips for handling them?
Anyone with a partner with this combination?
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2 Responses Jul 22, 2011

I have been with my partner for 2 and 1/2 years and known each other for 6 years before, with the bipolar and the OCD I feel like that I have no control over my own life at times. How I coped with OCD is I dont say anything on how and what he is doing with our house. He puts things in a cirtain place and I just dont move it. But we did come up with one plan and for the most part it seems to work I have one place in the house that I can put or do anything on is my desk. He says I am sloppy at times but I explain to him that I need one spot in the house to keep me sain. He goes so bad he organizes my drawls. That wouldnt have bothered me but the fact I cant have my socks even on the right side with out him fixing it and complaining. So my suggestion would be sit him down and say let me have one spotI understand you have OCD lets have a plan to help both of us to cope. Example your history of past relationships write it down and say look at it whenever you need a reminder of what happened with me and that also have a reason why you are with them now not your past relationship. So he can see it visually. Most important this will try to keep your self sane. The bipolar side.... well I am still learning day by day cause he has mixed and rapid cyclings all the time. Thats the main reason why i am on here. My partner said he wonted to break up just two weeks ago with me because we cause it quote words he is the devil and he has the devil in side of him. I deserve better. But when I guy hit on me a week later he got very up set and wanted to work it out. I love him and he is my bestfriend and that why i keep sticking around. I try really hard to talk to him about serious stuff when he is stable and that is the best idea for anyone with a biplor partner or any illness.

I think my partner may have OCD and BPD, But to even bring it up would be her yelling at me like im crazy, I didnt know that the drilling of sexual history could be OCD related because I go through that alot and Im like give it up I LOVE YOU. But if you truly love this person, give your all and definitely try to talk, and let him know you are there no matter what.