Being a Lonely Bisexual Male Sucks!

I've done the club and party scene, but I can't seem to connect with other bisexual males. I wonder, am I not interesting enough, am I not educated enough or what? So I spend my days sleeping until it's time to go to work. On the weekends I use to try to go out, but it is not fun doing things alone, therefore, I stay at home watching reruns of Roseanne or whatever movie they feel like showing or I may order a movie. Or maybe I'll write to my gay internet pen pal who lives in the same area, but doesn't want to meet me yet. How sad is that? I go the extra mile to be with people, but they won't return the favor to me. I'm tired of doing that, so, I stay home, but I'm not hurting no body but myself, I know this because they go on with their lives. I feel so left out when I find out that my coworkers get together over the weekend and I don't get an invite. Just as well, I don't have anyone to bring with me. I hate going to parties by myself. Now I'm afaid that I've became a homebody, I find myself being comfortable at home. That way, I can be myself, I don't have to pretend, I don't always have to do what someone else wants to do, I don't have to pay someone's way to a function. Don't get me wrong, I would love to go out and have fun, but with real people! People who will accept me for who I am and they don't have an agenda. For instance, a person may want to kill time with me until something else comes along. People are not right!  I'm through venting for now.

outmybox outmybox
41-45, M
8 Responses Mar 13, 2009

You my friend are right, It is very difficult to meet people who will be themselves and be open.
Accept me for what I am. A bisexual, I'm not straight or gay.

As one who trek through life mostly isolated, I can very much share your pain and plight. I hesitate to associate myself with people who strap themselves down to labels especially because most have harbored resentment and chiding views against bisexuals thinking we are "fence sitters" "untrustworthy" and et cetera.<br />
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I stray away from the gay culture because they only seem to invite a certain trend or characteristic of people-- things which I don't care to be immersed in. I am, first and foremost, an individual. Regardless of the things I like, I don't need a subculture representing my interests or desires unless it can draw out me as a person.<br />
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I am not a party goer. I don't like clubs mostly anyway. I'm a bit of a nerd. I have come out of the closet to my mother, sister, and a few others but I hesitate to publicize it at my school as I don't really want that kind of attention drawn towards me. I'd like to be a person and be accepted for who I am as ME rather than as a bisexual.

Hey man, I know how you feel.Us Bisexuals should all get together and dream up some superficial scene for ourselves.But knowing our luck only the fake Bisexuals would show and end up getting off with each other.<br />
I have watched every episode of Friends thirty three times on average.<br />
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As a side note I was flirting with a gay man today,it did me no good,I now remember what it feels like to have fun.<br />
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Oh well,this Ovaltine will only get cold if I don't drink it.<br />
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Has anyone done any good jigsaws lately?

know the feeling, good to hear someone else vent to let me know what I am feeling. Years solo, old now so guess that is the way of the world. Never seem to feel like I can find a place to actually go out to... and never feel like I could ever tell or ask another guy things like this. Glad there is this place where one can talk it out and have fantasies at least.

I'm the same, i haven't told anyone yet but i plan to very soon. I have no gay/bisexual friends so ive never been to a gay club/bar which i am a dissapointed about but i recently joined a group of gay/lesbian/bisexual people and its hard to get to know them (especially when they know each other and i dont) but you just gotta try. I am a shy person but, you just got to think to yourself that if they ignore you, or say something mean they mustn't be very nice and you don't ever have to see them again. People are generally nice and will talk to you even if they don't really feel like it and who knows maybe one of these days you'll meet someone special.

i can really related to wat ur talking about cause im the same way i rather stay home but when im home i juss feel so alone and it kills me inside. all i can tell u is that juss go out maybe to a bar hang out have a drink or two before u make up an excuse to leave and to the mall maybe somethng nice is there talk to people i know its hard and very because im going tru the proscess of beigng more people friendly. juss try it youll see there people that can be u good friend is u give them a chance

Don't give up. Get out of the house. Get around other people... people that lift you up, people that encourage you, people that turn you on. Get into places and situations where things happen! Life is lonely on the sidelines, I know. Take charge and make it happen: throw a party, find a hot club, start a group. Keep hope alive. Think positively and you'll attract positive to yourself. Believe you'll have fun, and you will.

i know exactly what you mean about staying home. i'm at home right now, and although i'm extremely lonely, i'd rather be here than out around people where i can be rejected or ignored. it's like either way, i'll be miserable. but i don't think we should give up. we have to lick our wounds and then get back out there. eventually, everyone finds their scene. <br />
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ali