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I'm So Tired Of Hearing That I Look So Young

I get so frustrated hearing from people that I will be so happy one day to look so young for my age. Well that's nice, tell me I look young when I get older, not now when I'm 25 and I hear from everyone that I'm 15. Why do people think that saying this is a compliment when you are only in your 20's?

One time I was at a makeup counter with my mom. The woman at the counter was waiting on my mom who got enough makeup to pick out something free. My mom told me I could pick out something and I had been eyeing this specific eye makeup so I said, " I would like to get this product" to which the girl replied, " OK well let's open it up and see if your mom approves." Are you KIDDING me? I was annoyed. I told her that my mom didn't need to approve my makeup because I'm 25. She tried to laugh it off but I must say it felt good to make her feel a bit uncomfortable. I hate that whenever I buy alcohol I constantly hear that I look 15 or younger. I use to just brush it off but after years of hearing this I just get annoyed. People need to come up with something else to say.

I also love the question: " What school do you go to?
" Oh I graduated a while ago." (Thinking the inquiring person is talking about college)
" Oh, well then what high school do you go to."
"Umm graduated from high school a long time ago too. Let me help you out, I also graduated college and I've been working for 4 years now in the real world."

I've tried makeup techniques, styling my hair differently, and I don't dress young for my age so I'm at a loss. I feel my size might have something to do with it too. I'm short and thin. Has anyone found some tips or techniques for making yourself look a bit older without it looking like you are playing dress up in mom's closet?
greeneyes32 greeneyes32 22-25 58 Responses Jan 17, 2011

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I have been going through the same thing, walking with my husband and other women asked if he was my dad, and I am a year older then him. It's very frustrating, but I know that I will never need to go for surgery to look younger like most of them

I'm having the exact same problem! I'm 22. Nobody is going to believe I am nearly 23 lol.

I was just at Costco and went to get a sample and the woman stopped me and said "You have to be over 18." Honey, I've been over 18 for quite a while now. It sucks!

People think I look about 16 and almost don't believe me when I say I just turned 24. It annoys the hell out of me when people treat like a kid when I'm not. And worst of all someone said hopefully I'm not one of those people who look young until they look old... :s Totally freaking out now! Am dying to look like an adult! :P

I'm 22, most people tell me I look my age to my early 30's and I never have to provide ID!!

However on facebook I have this random weirdos tell me I look 14-16.. And it's just like how the ****? It annoys me how ignorent some people can be !!

And are you saying people tell you you look 15 at a bar? Well that's descrimanation and should be addressed!

And what annoys me the most is not being heard!! The randoms who say it to me say looking young is a good thing. It's not , and these days why would anyone wanna look like a teen smh!!

Heigh5 has nothing to do with it! I'm 5ft9,turned 16 a few days ago. I look 13.... Im curvy, its so odd! Its just that I have natural golden blonde hair, big blue-green eyes, fair, pinkish skin and baby cheeks.. any tip? I've consjdered dying my virgin hair black, but I'm allergic... its so odd; specially because I have a older bf..

How about trying to check out your 14&12 yr olds from middle school and being told "sweety sit over there for a moment". Wait 10 minutes while 3 other parents who came in after you check out their children, hop up and say "excuse me I need to check out my daughters". And have the office workers say "you have children in this school? Are you sure your at the right location?" Nice, no consideration or respect and if the way I was addressed is how students are it's no wonder why schools have discipline issues. Children are learning attitude from the school! I'm aware my 5'3" height, 110lbs, and relatively smooth skin lend an idea of youth. Like I still have growing I could do but darn people ask more politely please, you may be speaking to an adult and even if you aren't you should try to show children how to be polite! Thanks! And I believe genetics mixed with life style choices keep that look or perception of youth on a person. Frustrated 41 year old 👩

Wow, I look bout 10-11 even though im 15 (nobody ever believes me when I tell them my real age) but I thought it would just sort itself out when I got older! Reading these comments I now know thats not true :(

Hmmm.... So you guys having trouble eh?
okay here is why you look young

1. Your eyes. The larger the eyes you have the more cute you will look and the more cute u are the more young you will look

2. The gap or distance between your eyes and eyebrows...
if distance is larger the more younger you look.

3. Jawline is more clear in teens above 15. (it is one of main reason for looking younger for boys.)

All these 3 reasons are the main problem. NOT HAVING MUCH WRINKLES ON YOUR FACE IS GOOD. But everyone have some wrinkles. If you have glowing red cheeks then you might have less wrinkles but i have told you the 3 main reasons.


1. Its good to look young the thing you can do is just see in the mirror and lessen the area between your eyebrows and eyes by moving them a bit downward (and stop moving them more downward when you find then you start looking a bit serious or mature) and don't open your eyes wide instead just for sometime close them a bit (not completely).
2. Your hairstyle matters too. You should have longer hair from the front (not too much long like girls have), so that you may not look like you just have had a baby cut from the front and comb your front hair such that your forehead is covered at least half.

TRY IT AND TELL ME THE RESULTS. I am just helping in the best way :)

I think I have everyone beat so far. I am 44 and people think I am in my 20's or less! I really need advice about how to change this situation. To make matters worse, my husband is about 10 years older and has white hair. People must assume I'm 20 and he's 40. The looks from other people are so disconcerting. I have two children, one will be 10. What do they think, I had him at 10 or 12? People can be really cruel and judgmental. They don't know anything about us, yet assume the worse. They look at me like I am a gold digger and my husband a pervert. Teens look at me in astonishment because they see me with a man that is perceived to be like my father. No, he's my husband of 15 years. It's just so frustrating.

I stumbled across these posts because I have just recently hit my limit on the ' you look like a baby' comments. My husband is 15 years older and I am about to be 31. So when I friend tells me that I look like a baby, its' an insult. I have 2 kids and its rather condescending to tell a mother of 2 that you think she is only 12 years older than her eldest child. So I am looking for empathy and ways to deal with it. Best of luck. I feel your pain

Just don't look at people faces searching for their reactions anymore. If someone insists on making eye contact with you, just say "Any problem?" or "I'm 44 years old!". But you should also consider that sometimes people are not thinking what we assume they are. I'm a dark skinned Brazilian and, when I was in Europe, as I had already read a lot about anti-immigration sentiment, I was sure everybody was looking at me and accusing me of being an illegal immigrant or a Muslim terrorist (I look a lot like Pakistani or Indian people). From the day when two people told me I looked very young (19-23) on, I became pretty sure that everybody was looking at me with my daughter and accusing me of being a teenager father. Besides, once I was in a diet and, after I lost 13 kg, I was sure everybody was looking at me and thinking how slender I was! :-)

I had that problem for years!

I'm 23 and I get the "are you 16?" All the time it is frustrating. I'm a college graduate and working professional who always gets the "what's that little girl doing here?" Look.
Next time we should all respond back to the rude ones with "oh my, you look so old" hahahahaha that will teach them. :)

Enjoy your youth!

I'm 22 and i look like 14. I'm also a graduate and i got the same comments as you. I'm fed up with people telling me i look small. They make me feel low and inferior. I'm always nervous to go somewhere new koz i know i'll be getting such negative comments.

I'm older, 62, but everyone thinks I'm in for 30-40's. I use Clinque , and still I smoke. What gives.

I'm 23 and look 40, u can imagine how I feel. Its heartbreaking and I really hate myself.

I'd rather look that than young.

I am currently 17 years old and am 5'0" already taller the my aunt and grandmother so I think I'm already done growing. Me and my friend went to her open house at her high school and we went into to her one of her teachers class room and he had asked us "What are you guys fifth graders?" I look like a 12 yr old plus I have had a fifth grader ask me out. I don't think my looks will ever catch up to my actual age. I was at restraunt one time and my older sister and younger sister both got "adult cups" and I got a kiddie cup. I'm sick of looking like a little kid. I don't even have much " curves". People look so shocked when I tell them my actual age.

Thats the same with me. I took my little cousin to a play group (with her mum) the carer signed me in as a child and asked me in a cute voice if i wanted to play outside (im 23). she thought i was 12! But in general people think im 15 or 16 and thats when im wearing heels, makeup hair done etc. This is so annoying, my boyfriend looks a bit older than me too and people tend to say why hes with me.
People tend to underestimate you also and look down on you. I feel i always have to prove myself, therefore i cant rely on my looks, which is a good thing.

yeah ..actually this sooooo frustrating...i am currently in 12th grade and while i was talking to my newly married bro's wife ...she asked me which class i was in..and my cousins told her to guess ...i was told her not guess too low ..she said 9th grade whole of cousins burst into fits...the worst part is that now i'm scared of going to collage and face life now on...

This so relatable! I'm 18 years old but I always, ALWAYS, get called a 13-15 year old. This past weekend I was on vacation, and in Dominican Republic the drinking age is 18. When I would go to the clubs/bars with my friends, all of them entered like it was nothing. I would always get stopped and carded for my id.
The other issue is with guys. At the pool I would always get hit on by 14 year old boys. It's frustrating. But I'm grateful, because hopefully when I'm in my 30's I'll look young! Perlas of not having to get any Botox or collagen to look younger

I feel the same way! Im 18 and I e been called 11, 12, etc. I was buying a lottery ticket and I said I wanted three, the guy saix I needed my mom! Im just like, uh, Im 18 here... I showed hi my id and he laughed it off. Then one of my friends for a while, a medic, he overheard me talking about when I might move out and hes like, wait, your not 11? And he even had me say by birth year out just to check. I hate this, its not a gift. Whe I flirt with guys my age, theyre not interested cause they think im not legal! Scratch that I cant even flirt. Id just look like a kid with a schoolgirl crush.

I'm facing just the same situation... I live in a country where it is normal to leave your parents' house when you get married, I'm 21 and going to college. I have to travel for 1 hour to get to my college and sometimes when I am done with my daily lessons I stop by my father's job so we can go home together, yesterday the building where he works hired a new security officer and he didn't let me go into the building because "he couldn't let underage people to come in". I felt so frustrated, I have gone there hunders of times and he wasn't the first officer who told me that. I told him that I am 21 and he didn't believe me, I showed him my ID and he didn't believe either! I had to call my dad so the officer would let me in!

In college most of my collegues don't take me seriously. Each year I'm always mistaken for a junior student when I'm about to finish all the courses of my career. On February, when the first semester's lessons began, a guy who was giving a tour for the new students, invited me to join his group for the tour, I felt so frustrated when I told him that it was my fourth year as a student in that college.

And once, I when to the movies with my boyfriend and the girl who was selling the tickets asked me for my ID, but she didn't asked my boyfriend for it, and I am older than him!!

A year ago, I went with my family to Miami for vacation, my brother is underage, so when we were leaving our country, my parents paid his underage tax, we were doing the line and the officer asked me if my parents had already payed my tax! and when we were coming back from the States, another officer asked me if I was 12 or older.

I understand the argument that most people say, "When you become 40, you'll look younger! ", may be they are right but it is really frustrating by now. I feel that I'll have to show my ID everytime I want to get a job or something!

Mistaking someones age is NOT the same as making comments about someones appearance or lack thereof. Saying "how far along is the baby" to an overweight woman is not the same as walking up to the same person and saying "jeeze lady you look really pregnant!" And after discovering that she isnt pregnant continuing to say "oh well you just really look pregnant, at least you look young enough to have kids!"
That is the same thing that people do when they make their ignorant petty remarks about a persons age related appearance. Its not always so innocent of a mistake.
I am 21 and the owner of a succesful local business, i drive a fairly nice car, and i act professional everywhere i go just as any man of business should.
People pathetically harrass me about my young appearance on a consistant basis, making petty comments like "daddys money buy you that car" or (when dressed in business attire) "you all dressed up today buddy"...i digress
But bottom line is that it is pretty demeaning and quite irritating. I have found it helpful to cope by having a chip on your shoulder and knowing where your head is at. Dont let people weigh you down.
"Happiness is governed solely by your mental attitude"

So after reading through these responses I would like to point something out. I'm 21, and I get mistaken for a 14 year old on a daily basis. It's frusterating to say the least.

But here's the thing, half of you are getting angry at people for honest mistakes and you can't do that. ANYONE would rather look younger than older for thier age, even though only those of us that actually do look younger know the pain, so we can't take our frustration out on those that are just making honest mistakes, now if they know you're older than you look and continue to make rude comments, then let the a**holes have it ;).

I have the same issue. I'm 34 years old and have worked in the public library for 9 years. I still deal with patrons that come in and ask me if I'm volunteering as a school project.
I get the "you will love it someday" speech on a regular basis. I've heard that now for 15 years and have yet to agree with it. How do you get people to respect you and listen to you when they think that you are a 16 year old???

I am 31 years old, and I've been carded for liquor ever since I turned 21. I've had people ask me if I'm still in high school and you're too young to have a 12 year old son. Ummm, I graduated from high school in 2001. I've had guys in their 40's not want to date me because they say I look too young. Very frustrating!

Looking young as a guy or girl is wonderful, sure it's annoying when you're in your twenties but think about when you're in your 30's and in your prime. You look like you're in your twenties and can have any woman/man from 18-45+. If someone is narrow-minded and refuses to even talk to 30 yr olds, you can just lie to her/him and tell her your in your twenties and get your **** on. It's not like you'd want to marry that kind of narrow-minded person anyway. So yea, just wait. Women don't age as gracefully as men so trust me, you hit the genetic jackpot! One day, you'll see that I'm right.

You are all lucky that you are female. I'm in the same boat but im a guy. Looking young as a girl i think is a good thing. A lot of guys like it. A 26 year old guy looking like hes 16-17 on the other hand, well you can imagine how much more complicated it is.

I am currently 26. I've been getting comments about how young I look since before I can remember. I didn't take it too seriously until I graduated college and became a young professional. In my first professional job, women would come up to me and ask me if I had a degree and I would reply "yes, a bachelors in public relations" and one woman asked if my degree was a four year degree and I told her yes.. A bachelors typically takes four years to obtain. She then told me I looked too young to have a degree. I felt as though I received less respect because of how young I look. But I always just carried myself professionally. I also had an interview once where the interviewer asked me if I really had a degree "because they check those types of things" and I said yes I really do and she told me that I look so young. I clearly did not take that job. At a work event/fundraiser that I helped with two weekends ago, I grabbed my purse from under the registration table and a volunteer asked if she could help me and I kindly said sorry just getting my purse and she said so rudely "oh I thought you were some child!!" And then I grabbed my lipstick from my purse and the other volunteer told me I was too young for lipstick. I just replied that I am 26 which is old enough for lipstick and both volunteers just stared at me. I am engaged and last weekend I went to a triple a vacation expo and I went to one table and asked if there were more brochures of the offerings (I only saw one and didn't want to take her last copy) and she said some rude comment about it. My aunt then interjected and said "she is looking for a honeymoon, that's why she is curious" and the woman said in the most rude way anyone had ever commented on my age: "HONEYMOON?!!! What business do YOU have getting married? You look like you're about 12 years old!! You are not old enough to be married." And I said "actually, I'm 26" and she continued saying she didn't believe me. I was so offended. My aunt and mom stood up for me and said their ages and asked if they looked that age and she didn't reply and then my aunt and mom told the woman I just have good genes. Then we went five tables over to a cruise vendor and was asked what I am booking a vacation for ... I said "I am booking a honeymoon" and he said "a honeymoon? Do you have a man to marry for this honeymoon or were you just thinking you would book a honeymoon and see what happens?" And I said ... "Yes, I am getting married August 2 and need a honeymoon to follow that wedding.. And then I walked away" .... Idiots.

Please tell me you called their supervisors and complained? I probably wouldn't have been able to hold my temper haha.

Im 35 years old. I got carded once for buying a imvu card at walmart. You need to be over 13 to buy one. I showed the manager my id. I gained 25 pounds in the pass year and a half. I dont have such a little girl figure anymore. You could try gainning some weight. When my back is healed from a sprain i had, im going to lift weights again.

Be glad you look like a teenager and not like an aged woman in her 40s.

Its not fun having peopld tellyou youde not old enough to do something even though you are.

I'm and engaged 28 year old college graduate with a professional job and I frequently get mistaken for someone in there early 20's or worse, in their late teens. Last year when someone at work told me I looked like I was 12 (I was 27) I almost cried but this year when someone came begging to the door of MY house for donation money towards anti-fracking measures in my state and asked me "if my parents were home" I was at first too shocked and upset to say anything but my real age but after he left I walked through the neighborhood looking for him, found his supervisor, and got him removed from his volunteer begging job for insensitive comments. Recently someone at work commented I was too young to get married, well I was able to nicely tell her that saying someone looks young is not a compliment. Especially since I knew she had a 26 year old son who was getting married. We now have a nice working relationship. My point is after years of reverse age discrimination and disrespect, I have learned to either nicely correct those that didn't realize they were being derogatory (like the co-worker) and get even with those that were just plain disrespectful and ignorant (like the door-to-door solicitor). The only good thing I have noticed is it seems to be getting better for me as lately I have been mistaken for a 24 year old which after being called 18 for years, I will take it.

Sounds like the volunteer made an innocent mistake. Nice work getting him removed from his job. You sound like a real winner.

"Please reply with authenticity, support and respect."

Clearly you didn't read and/or comprehend that part.

Its true though. I mean, I never complained that far, I get called out for being 11 when im 18 but I never tell the managers. As irritating it is, it was a mistake.

Getting him sacked was a little harsh...
Its quite easy to make a mistake and its not like he was particularly rude about it either.

1 More Response

When I started reading your post, it was surreal at some level because I had never imagined someone else going through the exact same problem.
I have been facing this since I school. I am 22 now and I keep getting it every single day.
"Which school do you go to?" I work for rural development and am doing my research in the field which requires me to stay in jungles and villages for months. And then they look at you like "what is a kid doing in a jungle? Oh wait, are you lost?" WTH. It is annoying because you're possibly smarter and more sensitive than most highly endowed 'older' looking people your age but you're hidden because you look young. Darn it. But anyhow, keep up the spirit ya'll. I guess we shall find another young looking companion for ourselves and together you shall beat the bejesus out of the 'older' looking people. haha. Power to you.