I Noticed I Still Struggle With The Loss Of My Friend.

Annette, My nettie, My Nene.

She was hit head on by a drunk driver on Saturday, June 2nd, 2012. I just talked to her that friday.
See my parents and her got into an argument and it wasn't because of her but because of her girlfriend. And my mom told her she didnt have to go. She could of stayed. Well after they moved out, me and Nene still kept in contact. We texted every so often. And then the texts just stopped coming. And there were so many times I would cry because I felt so alone. Nettie took me everywhere with her. We had so much fun. We have a lot of great memories.

And on my birthday I waited for a call. Never got one. I waited for a text... Never got one. I waited for a email a Facebook post. A message through Facebook. Anything that showed me she remembered my 18th birthday. And I got nothing. I was hurt. I was sad that she didn't tell me even hi. Well, June 2nd comes along and she texted me. She said how sorry she was she didn't text me and how much she tried to send the message but she couldn't. See her and her girlfriend were having problems. Her girlfriend left her, for another woman she was caught messing around with before. So as history repeated itself she was down in the dumps. She was heartbroken. Just like she was so many times because of HER!!!

Well we texted and I teared up really bad. Because I missed her. And I told her I knew things were going rough right now. But that god had a plan for everyone. And there was a reason for everything but I hoped it could bring us back together and make us stronger. I don't know why I told her that But I felt it was what she needed. Because she told me the same thing when I got into conflicts with my family. Well we said how much good memories we have together and how much we can't wait to make more. And I told her I hope that time comes soon. And the last text I ever got from her was, "I hope so little one, I hope so.."

Do you know how hard it is to just talk to someone one day and 24 hours later wake up to a call saying their gone. What's worse is I had no comfort. My parents were in California, and my brother doesn't live at home and he didn't even know till 2 weeks later when I told him. When I was able to even bring myself to admit that it actually happened.

You know she told my mom she was going to my graduation. She said she wouldn't miss it for the world. She was supposed to be there, And she told my mom that the same day I last heard from her. I never got to say goodbye. That's what kills me the most. That is why I feel like I never fully got over it. I have never lost someone before. Sure,I have gone to funerals. But no one I knew. And her funeral wasn't her. Her family didn't know anything about her. They hadn't been in her life since she was 19. And she was going to be 25 in july.

If you have ever lost a friend to drunk drivers on the road that are careless and stupid and need to cope with the pain.... then do it on here. Cause god knows I need help dealing with it....

And if you haven't experienced this... Then please be smart and don't drink and drive... Because if you do you will end up like my dear friend. Or if you know someone who is careless and stupid.. Then you will end up like me. missing a loved one....

Rest in Peace nene.... <3
SeliKeli SeliKeli
18-21, F
Sep 24, 2012