Alone In My Grief

2 1/2 years ago I lost my beautiful daughter to suicide. Now as of October, I have lost my amazing son to suicide. I was already in hell since my daughters passing now I am in deeper with no way out. Life goes on around me. People are doing their holiday shopping, decorating, baking, doing all of the normal stuff we all should be doing at this time. I myself, am in limbo. I weep everyday. Not able to leave the house. Not understanding how this could happen not only once, but twice...I want the world to stop. I want my children to come home. I want to be able to live again. I want them to be living again...
nomoretomorrows nomoretomorrows
46-50, F
8 Responses Dec 6, 2012

I'm so so sorry for your loss! I can't imagine loosing a child. On May 21, 2007 I was 5 months pregnant and I found my Unborn Daughters Father hanging in his room. I still cant get the image out of of my head. I was glad that it was me, instead of his parents or brother who found him. I miss him and my Daughter who is now 5 knows her father is gone, but she points up to the sky and says "daddy is in heaven with Jesus.
I hope that as the time goes your pain will ease up. I will keep you in my prayers

My little brother (who was a foot taller than me) took his own life on Jan 2, 2013.. 22 days ago. He was 24. My mama still has myself (26) and my younger brother (22) but the pure heartache and sadness that gas fallen over her is devastating. We're all unsure of how to think or feel, but as a mother myself, I can't imagine the feeling. God bless you and all of us affected by such horrible pain and I pray you find your way little by little. My heart goes out to you.

I'm so sorry. :( I lost my brother to suicide, and I saw what it did to my family, especially my mother. I struggle with depression as well, and the only thing that stops me from truly considering ending my own life when things get really bad is knowing how hard it would be for my mother to go through it twice. I'm literally the only family she has left, so she wouldn't even have anyone to turn to. I can't pretend that the thought doesn't pass through my mind from time to time when I'm going through really dark times, though. I can't imagine how hard it must be for you to try to move on, but I'm truly sorry that this happened in your life.

I know there is nothing that can help because life will never be the same. If anything eases the pain, it will only be temporary until reality sets in again, if you are able to even hold on to what reality is. I can't after dealing with a suicide. I don't know you but I want to hug you because no one should ever have to go through what you are going through. You have a son/daughter that is with you still and I can only assume that your strength for being here comes from the fact that they need you now more than ever. I feel alone in grief too. I wish I could help you

i know it's gonna be hard for you, i can't imagine living alone the pain hurts so much.You should have another baby or adopt a child and give it all the love u have.And let your two children live through that child.Thats what i'd do.Every adopted kid deserves a loving mother.

I'm so sorry for your loss. I understand, I lost my brother around 2yrs ago to suicide. I thought I could put a brave face on it and deal with it, but bottling things up doesn't work. Remember to share how you feel.. I hope you can pull through this, and if you need someone to listen, I'm here. Best Wishes.

oh, sorry for your loss. The words are not enough. Be strong !!!

God...god is with!!!