Ex's And Lawyers...........

It has been too quiet......too long without something happening. Then, started my Monday morning with an email from the ex's lawyer. I tried to not let it get to me but it did and got worse as the sun in its unfailing consistency rose and set. I am surprised I still have a left side to my jaw after this nervous tick started shortly after reading the email. It really doesn't have to do with what was said or the way it was said or the words used. It is the "Spirit" of it all and the reality that all it does is hurt the kids. The double standard and unwillingness to compromise.

So one step forward and three steps back. I spent 5 hours with my children a week ago and am now considering backing off till some agreement, temporary or permanent is come to. My time used to be about 60% while having to juggle work responsibilities and now I am down to nothing and at best when said and done every Wednesday and EOW. The kids don't seem to care really and they definitely do not want to be around their new stepfather. Also my ex wants me to do all the driving back and forth which round trip is probably 80 miles. More if I come back to the town where I live and there is more to do. Please keep in mind when he exercised his time with the kids he did not bring them back. I had to get them which put me home around 6 to 6:30pm.

Well thank you EP'ers, talking to you just led me to my next move. They may not go for it but I have to try.

Stay tuned!
Givemeabreak2 Givemeabreak2
36-40, F
6 Responses Dec 4, 2012

Aiyana77 - that has been our hope that a judge would rule in our favor after seeing that we just want to get along and he is refusing to use common sense but it is clear that there is only room for one parent here and it won't be me.

That is really a horrible position to be in with him not showing up and violating the parenting plan. We have played that chicken game before and I always gave in for the kids. It has never set well with me because that is sending a clear signal that you can cross my boundaries. I am dealing with a Narcissist and if you read up on that they say you have to set boundaries and stick to them. In your case you would be well within your rights to take the kids back home after waiting for a specified amount of time and making contact to CYA.

Boundaries are a must. I had to allow them to be crossed to a certain extent because I could not afford legal presentation and di not want my kids to suffer. Now that I have yet another attorney I at least have over a year of blatant violations that he has to deal with. He doesn't even respect the court. Well my BF said do nothing ...a narcissist eventually will hang themselves.

My ex refuses to drive ever! He will tell me that he will drive halfway and then not show up forcing me to drive the rest of the way! It is frustrating. I hope that you can find a resolution!


Thank you, I am sorry anyone has to deal with it. I want to do my part to get the system changed. During the mediation the judge agreed that he should do the driving since he moved away out of the county and school district but he refused unless I agreed to stay in the current school district that the children attend. I'm sticking to my guns and I have plenty of ammo to back up my decision. He is clearly just trying to be difficult and saying his time is more important than mine. That ****** me off!

If the judge picks up the fact that you are being reasonable and he is just being difficult to be difficult that just might **** off the judge and youll end better than you were looking for in the first place.

<p>I think you can most likely contest the driving part and the judge will order him to do half of the driving. But if you don't and just go along with it he will get as much as you give him. i have to say it always really pissed me off when people would hold kids over the ex's head. I am sorry you have to deal with this. My prayers go out for you.