Yet He's Still Alive

 My brother is about 4 years older than me. Therefore, when I was about 6 he was my favorite person in the world. He was like any typical boy. He played sports, loved to skate and had a good group of friends. However when he entered highschool, he got in with a really bad group of people. My brother is actually my foster brother, so he lived with a few different families before mine. So he had some insecurity issues, and he couldn't really fight peer pressure. Eventually he got into drugs and alocohol, which didn't really help what happened. When his senior year came around, his girlfriend of a year and him separated. Something happened, I think all the years of abandonment plus the fear of stepping into real life after highschool caught up with him and he snapped. He became paranoid, he started to hallucinate, and none of what he said made any sense. I'm sure some of this was from the drugs, but not all of it was. It's been a a good while since than, and he's gotten much worse. He lives in my parent's basement, he can't hold a job, he talks to himself, he acts very strangely, he keeps a journal where he writes random thoughts and poems that only he can understand, he's lost any respect for anyone. For awhile, I was the only one who stuck by him. But, these days it's hard. He's become incredibly selfish and I don't know if I believe he's as "mental" as everyone thinks he is. I mean, he can "turn it on and off", for instance, I hadn't heard him speak rationally in ages, but than the cops came by, and he acted completly normal. I've tried to reach out to him, but it goes in one ear and out of the other. I don't know who he is anymore, I've lost him, all that's left is some shell. I try to act like I don't care, or that I've washed my hands clean of him, but I know that I can never do that. I feel like I should be able to do something, but I don't know what to do. I still trying to hold my family together as it is.

XxSperanzaXx XxSperanzaXx
26-30, F
5 Responses Mar 21, 2009

He is still here with you and that is all that matters.

You are doing what you can already :)

He's seen a doctor, and the doctor thought he had a mental illness. Which I agree with, BUT, I don't think it's half as bad as makes it, he exaggerates it. Plus, the doctor has only seen him once or twice. As for the parents, well they've more or less given up. They split up, so my father has nothing to do with him, and the mother is in denial, and she won't put her foot down. Which is half of the problem. My other two sisters and I have tried to get them to do something, but they never do. Which is one reason why it's gotten so bad. He went to jail once already, (My dad pressed charges on him about a year ago) So, when he got out, he acted as angelic as he could, but that faded when he got comfortable again. He's been to numerous drug rehabilitation places and they never work, out patient is a joke when it comes to him. My parents don't want to kick him out because they don't think he can make it on his own. Also, he's not into drugs as heavily anymore, but he's gotten worse regardless. There's not much that I can do, because the circumstances are still the same. But thanks to both of you for the advice. I really appreciate it

First, get him to see a doctor to rule out mental illness. What about your parents? They must intervene. This young man needs help right away. Check his living space for any drugs. Try talking to him, though he may be irrational so get the family involved. See if a counselor of some sort can get involved. Let me know how it goes. Maybe call different places like drug rehabilitation places or somewhere where they can help you cope with his behavior. Surely there are resources somewhere. Go to a police station and ask for their advice.

Ohhh that bites...stay strong, if not for him than for you, you've tried to be there for him this far.<br />
I wish I knew a sublime easy answer, but there isn't one. Just try to always make it known that you're there for him; that if he needs you that badly you'll always be there.