After a 20 year marriage , my husband left me for another woman. He apparently had been involved with her for a couple of years. In those last two years, my spouse had worked hard on alienating me from my boys (ages 15 and 13). He mocked me; made fun of me and shamed me. My health had deteriorated and I was depressed. When he left...he took the boys with him. He already had an apartment and they cleared out my house. I was in shock. They never returned (the boys). Now it is four years later...the children are 19 and 16 years old. I continue to contact them in many ways, but there is no response. they blame me for the failed marriage and only listed to their father. I pay child support and send gifts. they usually show up for christmas, but I don't even think I will see them this year. I am so angry and disappointed, but I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. does that make sense?! I have lost most hope even though everyone (including some of my ex's family) say the kids have been brainwashed and they eventually will see the "light". I have decided to begin living again. I returned to my maiden name after he remarried this summer. I don't send money unless court-ordered. This year I decided to use their Christmas money to sponsor a "poor child's" Christmas. I'm sure this will be more appreciated by this child than by my children. I am so sad, but I am tired of being ignored by the kids. they were raised better and they need to learn to treat me with some respect. I will continue to text/call, but I have to protect myself a little too. I need your thoughts. My ex only contacts me to send more $$$$. I am sick of it!