I Lost My Father to Cancer

I Lost My Dad Too Cancer July 11, 2008

By: atiyanorman

Written on August 27th, 2008

MY NAME IS ATIYA NORMAN... MY DAD DIED FO CANCER JULY 11, 2008 AT 10:23AM .. I THOGHT I WAS ALONE BUT AFTER HEARING ALL THESE STORY OF U GUYS WHO HAVE LOST THERE DADS TOO HELPS ME COUP WITH THE LOSS OF OF MYFATHER NEVER AND A MILLION YEARS I WOULD HAVE IMAGINE LOSSING MY DAD....I WAS DADDY LITTLE GIRL. FIRST MY DAD STARTED LOSSING WEIGHT THEN HE STARTED THROWING UP ALOT FINALLY MY MOM COVINCED HIM TO GO TO THEDOCTOR TO FIND OUT WHAT WAS WRONG, THATS WHEN THE TEST CAME BACKAND WE FOUND OUT HE HAD COLON CANCER MY DAD BROKE DOWN AND CRIED, HE NEVER CRIED IN FRONT OF THE KIDS AND NEVER SHOWED THAT HE WAS IN PAIN EVERYTIME WE WENT TO VISIT HIM HE ALWAYS WAS AND GOOD SPRIT.. EVERY SENSE HE WAS DIAGONSE WITH CANCER EVERYDAY THERE WAS MORE NEWS THAT THE CANCER WAS SPREADING HE ONLY GOT ONE TREATMENT OF chemotherapy, BECAUSE DOCTORS SAID HE BLOOD LEVELS WAS TO LOW..MY DAD SAID THAT EVERYDAY THEY ARE THROWING ME CURVE BALLS BUT IM TRYING TO HIT THEM ALL OUT THE PARK.. AFTER THAT HIS HEALTH STARTED TO FELL IT WAS SAD TO SEE HIM LIKE THAT WEAK THE SAME MAN WHO USE TO PICK ME UP AND GIVE ME BIG HUGS WHO CARRIED ME WHO TAUGHT ME HOW TO RIDE A BIKE GAVE ME MY FIRST DRIVING LESSON WAS GONNA LEAVE ME ..... THE LAST WORDS MY DAD SAID TO ME BEFORE HE COULDNT TALK ANYMORE WAS THAT HE LOVED ME FROM THE DAY I WAS BORN.... AFTER THAT HIS ORGANS STARTED SHUTING DOWN ONE BY ONE I NEVER GOT A CHANCE TO SAY GOODBYE TO HIM, I NEVER FORGET THAT MORNING WHEN MY MOMS CALLED ME I MISSED THE CALL SO I CALLED HER BACK THE SOUND OF HER VOICE CRYING SAYING THAT T HE'S GONE YOUR FATHER IS GONE THAT MOMENT KEEPS PLAYING OVER AND OVER IN MY HEAD.... EVERYTIME I THINK OF HIM I BRAKE DOWN AND CRY AT WORK AT HOME I MISS SO MUCH!!!!! I JUST WANT HIM TO COME BACK SO I CAN TELL HIM HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM... MY FATHER AND MY MOTHER WAS MARRIED FOR 30 YEARS, TO SEE MY MOTHER SAID EVERYDAYMAKE ME SAID AND ANGRY AT THE SAME TIME WISHING THAT HE WOULD HAVE FOUND OUT ABOUT THE CANCER EARLIER BUT MY DAD HATED DOCTERS HE NEVER WANTED TO GO I JUST WISHED HE DID... BUT I

STILL LOVE HIM......... AND SO DOES HIS NINE GRAND CHIDREN HE WAS VERY CLOSE TO ALL HIS GRAND KIDS... THE YOUNGEST ONES WONT KNOW HOW GREAT OF MAN THEIR GRANDFATHER WAS..... THE DAY FO HIS FUNAREL AFTER WE ALL CAME BACK TO THE HOUSE I WENT UP TO HIS ROOM AND OPEN HIS CLOSET THE SMELL OF HIS COLONGE MADE ME BRAKE DOWN AND CRY I CRY EVERYDAY SINCE HE PASSED EVERYTIME I THINK OF HIM OR LOOK AT HIS PICTURE OR SNIFF HIS T SHIRT THATS SMELL LIKE HIM I CRY.. AS THE DAYS PASSES MY LOVE FOR MY FATHER GROWS STRONGER THE THOUGHT OF HIM NOT BEING THERE ON HOLIDAYS BIRTHDAYS MAKES MORE SAD .... HIS BIRTHDAY JUST PASSED AUGUST 9, 2008, AND MY MOM PICK UP HIS ASHES THAT DAY.. I JUST WANT TO KNOW IF HE IS OK I KNOW HE DIDN'T WANT TO DIE SO SOON HE TOLD MY MOTHER WHEN HE FOUND OUT ABOUT THE CANCER THAT HE WAS SCARED AND HE DIDNT WANT TO DIE... HOW LONG DO ONE GRIEVE FOR ME I THINK ITS GONNA TAKE A WHILE I HAVE NO CLOSER. IM GONNA BE SAD FOR ALONG TIME ITS HARDTO LOSE A PARENT A GOOD PARENT, I USED TO SAY I WISH I DIDNT HAVE A FATHER SO I COULDNT FEEL SO MUCH PAIN BUT U KNOW WHAT IM GALD I HAD MICHEAL NORMAN AS A FATHER I COULDNT ASK FOR A BETTER FATHER WHEN WE MEET AGAIN DADDY AND HAVEN I WILL HUG U AND I WILL BE YOUR DAUGHTER AGAIN LOVE U DADDY ALWAYS AND FOREVER NEVER SAY GOODBYE BECAUSE GOODBYES ARE FOVEVER....... LOVE YOUR DAUGHTER ATIYA NORMAN!!!

By: atiyanorman

Age: 26-30

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4 responses

xleix

Type your comment here...Hi My name is sinead and i am 19. i lost my dad to cancer just 5 days ago. Reading your story is like looking at a mirror image of my own. My dad lost a lot of weight, throwing up and became quite irritable. He was in complete denial about it all and kept telling us he didnt need to go to the doctor. He eventually went about 4 weeks ago and was diagnosed with Colon cancer. At first doctors were positive about it all and were all on for chemo. Like u, bad news just seemed to keep coming every day. It had sprad to his liver, he had to go for surgery to get a colostamy bag, then they couldnt remove the tumour. He promised us all he would fight it but just 2 weeks after being admitted to hospital, we were all called in to say our goodbyes and be with him in his final moments. Its all a blur and i still can't believe it has happened. I fell apart as I watched his breathing get shallower and shallower until he just stopped. Im lucky that i have my mother and 7 other brothers and sisters for support. I cry everytime i think of him and still feel numb by the pain. When i go to bed at night i wish that i'll wake up and it will all be a bad dream but when i wake up, its like a horrible feeling washes over me. I know it will take time to heal and it's still pretty raw, but i feel so lonely. I was a daddys girl too and the youngest of 8. I'm worried about his business, our own financial situation and above all how my mother will cope without her husband of 35 years.

Reading your stories and comments has helped me see that i'm not alone and it helps to know that others out there are going through the same thing. I just hope that he is smiling down on me and will continue to look out for me as he always done. xxx

Jun 11, 2009
1 like
princessalexrox

I lost my daddy too. my name is alexandra but they call me alexx and im 13 i lost my daddy when i was 5 on mothers day in a car accident. i dont remember hym at all. it was a tragic sitee to see my dad laying down dead on the street and everythingg coming out of his body and alot of blood. i miss hym very muchh):

Feb 16, 2009
1 like
xlyssajx

Im so sorry for your loss. The same things happened to my Dad- the jaundice, and having to sit there and do nothing while his body gave out on him. I understand that you didnt want to be there. When my Grandpa and my Gram died, I didnt want to be there, but for some reason this time was different. I knew I needed to be there for him, because I know he knew I was there. And when he did manage to say I love you back, it meant the world to me. I miss him everyday, but i know he wanted to be remembered for the fun loving guy he was, not his last few days in the hospital. I try to remember the good times, because the bad ones are just too bad. Again, Im sorry for your loss, and if you ever need to talk to anyone, Im here.

Sep 6, 2008
2 likes
interested23

I didn't loose my father from cancer, however I did loose my mother. She passed away on Oct 1st of 2005 at 1:00pm. She was diagnosed when I was 17 and died when I was 20. I couldn't handle it and my life slowly started to fall apart. Things are better now but the pain still feels like it was yesterday. My mother, my sister and I were best friends and it was like loosing a piece of myself that was very vital when she died.

Sep 5, 2008
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