The Man Who Was There, But Not...

...never smiled. Never laughed or showed emotion. He was made out of stone and stood with horrible posture. This man was my father. He was not very smart, but smart enough to help raise two kids, or so he said. He did what he thought he had to. Show up to baseball games, sit at a parent teacher confrence, sign off on medical papers. He once said he would always be there if I needed him. Yet one time I remember him saying, "Girl, if you ever get in trouble for doing something stupid, dont use me as your one phone call." He wasn't a bad man, but he was a stern one, If he felt a little slapping here and there would help shut me and my brother up, then that's what he would do. He was a cold man to my mother, and the main reason for so many of her mental problems. He would never talk to her, or show compassion. When she divorced him, all he did was blame and point fingers. His death changed my life drastically. Sometimes I can't even believe he's not here. To be honest with you, and myself, I miss him very much. Because that one, very rare, smile directed at me was all I ever asked for. He never smiled, so that says a lot. 
HopeInConstruction HopeInConstruction
22-25, F
4 Responses Jul 28, 2010

We can't fix either future or the past. The way we define those memories and the future can make what universe will plan for us.

I'm so sorry girlie =( that made me wanna cry. ='(

Wow! So sorry for your loss. Was this recent? I just recently lost my dad. He was sick so I know he is in a much better place. Was your dad sick or was it sudden? If you wanna talk about it, write back!

wow...i hope u find closure and can be happy again