My Fiance Left Me...

He was the love of my life. No one treated me like he did. He appreciated the thing I do. My inspirations. My dream. My philosophy. My everything. He loved me for me. The day he met me, he told me... "I knew you were the one. The moment you laughed, my heart told me you were the one." We had been engaged for about 6 months. During the 5th month, I had to return home. I had to visit my family. I was so scared cause I was going to be away for 3 months. And he would be going back to Germany for 2 months. I cried every night to him scared that something would happen. He assured me nothing would. His soothing vice would calm me down to the point where I trusted his word. My fiance, my love, my world had told me that we will make it. Off I went. I left the islands. He promised me we would talk everyday. He promised that he would be there. He told me "whenever you get lonely baby, just look at the moon, and know I am looking upon you as you sleep. Making sure you are safe. I am always there. And when that doesn't help, close your eyes and feel your heart beating. My heart is your heart. I will be keeping you strong. I will be there." I took those words to heart. The night he flew to Germany were the longest 15 hours of my life. I had a gut feeling...but I didn't listen. The first month went well. We shared my birthday. Our anniversary of months. We shared our love still. Then one day, it all went away. I was at a camp as a counselor. I was battling a serious sinus infection. I had woken up from a nap and noticed i had gotten a message from him. I hadn't heard from him in almost a month because the internet was never working. The first line that I read was... "Hey, I don't know how to tell you this but...." At that moment I dropped my phone. I fell to floor and screamed. I knew what this was. I knew this was the end. I kept reading even as my heart was breaking. I couldn't believe it. My fiance was leaving me. Telling me he wants change. He wants to experience new things. He is not ready. He wants me to move on. And the worst...his heart doesn't want me anymore. The man of my dreams, had left me. Over Facebook. The only way we could communicate. And he had been feeling this for awhile but didn't want to hurt me because he couldn't see me hurt. A thousand miles away, my fiance left me. Realizing he didn't really truly mean the words he said. According to him, he didn't really think about it. And according to his mom. But he said that I will always be in his heart. He told me that even though he is moving on, I will always have a special place in his heart. Right now, I am trying to be strong. I will always love this man. He will always be in my heart. I will never forget him. And as time goes on I will learn to love again. And i hope I will. But I will always love him. The love of my life. But as I fall asleep tonight, I will say goodnight. Not goodbye because our love will never die, but simply goodnight. Because there will be a new day tomorrow. Even if its without him, I will carry on with my heavy heart. I will learn to grow, I will learn to love again, and I will learn that things happen for a reason. But all I can say now, I love you. 
serenasharkie serenasharkie
18-21, F
8 Responses Jul 27, 2011

My fiancé had a psychotic break. I tried to get him through a hard, irrational, time and he pushed me away. First he ran away, but came back. Sometimes I wish he would have just left and never returned. The pain of seeing him is unbelievable especially when he no longer wants to see me, because "I can do better".

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This just happened to me :(

I had met this guy and fell head over hills in love with him. We met back in October. He had said after a couple of weeks that the feelings weren't there. But we continued to be friends. He then said that he wanted to try again, so I did. Then about a month later, he said that he wanted to try and work things out with his baby's Mama. He came crawling back a week later. I was stupid enough to take him back. But I was in love with this man! We moved in together, and he proposed to me in May. We set the wedding date for September. On July first, He decides that this is not what he wants and that he doesn't love me. How do you just fall out of love? He said that he never wanted to hear from me again. 2 days later, he has the nerve to text me and see how i was doing and then proceeded to ask me if i wanted to come over so we could have sex, just as friends. I was speechless. At least part of him misses what he had!

This just happened to me a few days ago, my fiance proposed to me and said we would spend Christmas together, I waited for him for 6 months, and gave him all the love I had in me everyday knowing he couldn't respond back. He was my world but 3 days ago, he sends me a text saying he's going overseas to Kuwait for a year and his family is more important and he's cutting contact with everyone including me, he said never text or call me ever again. We've been together for a year, half of it was him training in the Army, he never told me though that he switched from being unactive to active duty so he'll be leaving in a few months and he's not going to contact me to let me know he's okay, all I can do is hope and pray he comes out alive. I'm saying the same words with the same feelings as you. this is a learning experience, to go slower with the next relationship, but never loose your devotion and passion, the next guy will take it and will hold on to it and never let go. Don't regret anything, even though your heart is heavy, love always finds a way <3

im sorry. my fiance left me too and its so painful..

i am sorry to hear of this, man i can only imagine. @ Darkangel1232 So it took you 2 years well maybe or at least i pray i can recover cause its going on 2 years since me and my ex broke up and i still love him . What can i do ? Cause i don't want to keep feeling as i do miserable beating myself up when all i ever tried to do was love a man who i thought loved me ,,<br />
@ Serenasharkie I will be prayn for you but you sound so strong. Which i thought i was too, but it kills to keep loving this man when he doesn't love me..

I am being strong because he told me to be strong. I know that I have whole life to live. And since I didn't die when he left me, I know I can live on in life. I will always love him.

/hug<br />
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I'm here for you