My Freshman Year

I'm relelately young, but I do believe I have lost the innocence I once had as a child. Definately. Looking at me, some people would still think I'm the innocent one out of my group of friend with my looks, sometimes described as "angelic" (lol!!) I have blonde hair, ice blue eyes and deep dimples and can get away with murder!
But it was in my freshman year I really lost my innocence. I started wearing make-up, getting the boys and dressing like a sl*t to discos. I have done other things that would probably surprise a lot of people too that I don't even want to mention on here.
I had a secret boyfriend coz my friends hated his guts. I am a hearbreaker. I ended up breaking his heart too. I flirt with guys a lot. I want attention. I had a bit of an eating disorder earlier this year where I kept making myself throw up (I'm ok now) and exercise obsessively. I was bullied when I was younger and teased for being different. I had my first snog aged 12. I've gone behind my friends' backs, my familys back. I've done other things that I am certainly not proud of too, but what's done is done. And my innocence is gone.
LittleMissDimples LittleMissDimples
18-21, F
1 Response Aug 29, 2012

I think your just misunderstood. We all do things were not proud of. Other people and society can make you feel like a bad person for being you. But honestly I think just like me the childhood teasing turned into fuel and it ended up pushing you to be the kind of girl you are. Amybe it was for the satisfaction of knowing those people were wrong or maybe it was just becuase you felt like you needed to do things that you thought could make you feel good but one things for sure. Your innocence is not meant to stay forever, weather it's taken or given.

Yes, some things I have done in my life may surprise a lot of people. But at the end of the day I am still a good girl, even though my innocence is gone. I'm a good student and get straight A's. I'm proud of that. I give and get respect and I am me.