I Lost My Older Sister To Cancer.

When I was 4 years old my older sister was diagnosed with leukemia, at a young age of course i dident understand what was happening other then getting to go visit my sister in the hospital. My  sister went through 4 years of ups and downs and our last shot was a  bone marrow transplant, luckily my twin brother was a donor, and it seemed to work. Me and my twin stayed at our grandparents house alot, and my older brother at our grandmas. It had just been mine and my brothers 8th birthday and  it wasent anything special with all the focus on alex's health. One day my mom called and said that we should come back home for a visit. On the drive there me and my brother were so excited because we thought it was a suprise birthday celebration. We my got there to find my whole family there and figured our guess was right, my mom called us into her room and i already had a feeling. She said to us,  When people are very sick they go up to a place called heaven thats where alex is now. remebering that the night before i had the strangest dream of my sister in a beautiful garden waving. Being 8 i have no idea what death is, let alone that im never gonna laugh, talk or see my sister again.
Now im 19 and the pain is undiscribable. i feel like it was a dream, and everyday have the feeling it should of been me, my sister was the most loving and caring person, even in the hospital she would take care of the other little children and painting there nails and making them laugh. I just feel like i will never amount to anything as great as she would. I just need to  i dont even know what.
Thanks for listening.

Samantha1235 Samantha1235
18-21, F
1 Response Aug 6, 2010

Wow Im so sorry about everything you went threw. i truly am. i hope you start to feel at least a little better soon.