She Would Not Go to the Doctor.

At the age of 56 my Mum told my sister that she had found a lump. My sister, a nurse, looked at the lump, then she asked our Mum how long it had been there. My Mum was frightened, it had been there for almost a year. It had grown angry.

As you would expect she had an operation, chemo and radiotherapy, but sadly lost the fight for life just after her 57th birthday.

Within a year, she had died.

Why did she not go to the doctor when the lump appeared? I never found out. Was she scared? Embarrased? I will never know.

If you find a lump, please go to see your doctor. In the majority of cases, it is not cancer, but if it is, the earlier you are seen the better.

41-45, M
6 Responses Jun 9, 2008

My mom found a lump but her doctor told her not to worry about it. She passed away a month ago. I don't know why she didn't try to get a second opinion if she was worried. When she returned to the doctor after 6 months the cancer had already spread. Denial is a powerful thing.

I can empathise with you. <br />
My Mum originally had breast cancer 17 years ago when I was 5 years old. From then on my Mum was fearful and skeptical of doctors. Growing up, I rarely went to a doctor. <br />
In the past few months my family have just found out that my Mum's cancer has spread.<br />
She first found a lump in May 2008. <br />
She told NO ONE...Until July 2010. <br />
She wouldn't show me her breast tumour but my Dad said it was about the size of a golf ball. The cancer has subsequently spread to her lungs and spine. She's now terminally ill. <br />
<br />
I can't figure out why she would leave it so long. <br />
I can't help but think, "God damn it! If you had only gone to the doctors as soon as you'd noticed a lump then maybe you'd live to see me marry and have a family". <br />
<br />
It hurts. I feel like she's betrayed us even though I know it was us she was concerned about. She didn't want to upset our lives. My mum is 48.<br />
<br />
I'm sorry for your loss but if it's any consolation, your story has helped me.

im so sorry. my dad has had cancer 4 times.

Hi 'onceandfutureglow' and 'MRMON',<br />
<br />
Thank you both for your kind words.<br />
<br />
It has been 15 years since she passed. I can honestly say that I it took a full 10 years for me to get over it, but I am at peace with her death now, all of my memories of her are now good ones when she was in full health.<br />
<br />
Thanks again.<br />
<br />

I can sympathize with you-my mom was 60 when she was diagnosed with lung cancer---it's been 20 years-and I still miss her ---horribly!! She lived for 3 months after she was diagnosed---it was a difficult time. <br />
<br />
Take care of yourself---

I'm sorry for you - however old or young she is, however old or young you are...however much or little time you have to prepare yourself, you are never prepared for your mom to go. How long has it been?