I Never Got To Say Bye

I was angry when my mom went into the hospital. I argued with her and didn't say what I should've told her and one night we found out that she was being kept alive by machines and I realized it was to late to tell her I loved her and that she was my biggest hero. She battled cancer for 1 year 4 months and 5 days. I never thought about how it would end but I guess at the time I didn't care. I should have let her know how I felt. At the end she didn't know who I was and seeing her like that made me feel dead inside, I hated everything, I couldn't make it in school. All I could think about was all the things I didn't tell her. When we took her off machines I tried to say goodbye but it wasn't right she didn't know me, she wasn't my mother. I would give anything to apologies for acting like I did and to let her know all the things I should have said. But it's too late.
Btimez3 Btimez3
18-21, M
7 Responses Nov 18, 2013

Your mother knows you loved and cared, and it's never to late to tell her how you feel, my mom died 4 years ago and I tell her, and now my father who just passed 3 weeks ago that I love and miss them, as a parent I know my kids love me even if they don't always show it, she knows and is watching over you, before my father died I would sometimes out of the blue just cry, sometimes I would write a letter to my mom, telling her how I felt at that time, it sounds weird but it has helped me vent when I needed to.

For anything you need I am here for you I know how it feels to lose somebody of your family I lost my brother when I was 12 :'(

Hi Braeden, I'm Chrystiane. I'm so sorry you lost your mom and I can't imagine how hard that was and must still be. I don't know your beliefs but I believe your mom knew how sorry you are and she was never angry with you. I believe your mom is and will always be with you. Idk if any of what I am saying is helpful to you but if you ever want to talk I will listen. By the way I have a son Jeff 17 and my Braden is 15. Take care

I am really sorry for whats happened its hard enough to lose your mum but seems worse when you dont get the chance to say goodbye, I know from personal experience. Believe me when I say your mum will not have given the argument a second thought and knew you loved her. She will always be around you and sometimes you will feel her there, its not your imagination she is there my friend.

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I'm very sorry for your loss. I understand just how difficult it can be to lose a loved one. I want to share something with you that brought much comfort to me when I lost a loved one. It is a scripture from the bible in John 5:28,29. It says "Do not marvel at this, because the hour is coming in which all those in the memorial tombs will hear his voice and come out, those who did good things to a resurrection of life, those who practiced vile things to a resurrection of judgment." All of us who have lost loved ones in death will have the opportunity to see them again in the near future.

The Bible also holds out another hope in Revelation 21:4. It says "And he will wipe out every tear from their eyes, and death will be no more,+ neither will mourning nor outcry nor pain be anymore. The former things have passed away." Not only do we have a hope of seeing our dead loved ones again, but we can rest assured that we will never lose them due to sickness, or any other reason.

No it's never too late. Your mother lives on in your heart. And she knew you loved her, she knew who you are better than you do, and she loved you more than anything in the world. It's what mothers do. When you tell us you hate us, it means we're doing our job and being responsible parents, and we know you don't mean it. We know you love us. We can see through the anger and the hurt and the confusion, we can look inside your hearts and see the person you are and the adult you will be. Stop beating yourself up. She would hate that.

Thank you

I'm here for you if you need someone to talk to. I lost my mother too, though I was much older at the time, and I'm a mother. Let me know if I can help or comfort you.