She Was My Best Friend

I lost my mother on November 5th, 2012. She was my best friend, my only true confidant, and the most nurturing women I have ever known. She did nothing for herself, even staying with a man she couldn't stand for years before he pushed her to her limit and he had to leave, or, be asked to leave, just because she wanted her children to grow up with a father figure. She was barely 51, and apparently had an arrhythmia, where the heart doesn't pump enough blood to the brain, so she probably got dizzy, sat down, went unconscious, and the rest happened painlessly from there. That's how she was found, sitting with her head in her hands on the bathroom floor downstairs. I guess it's better that way?
She was the best all around person I have ever met. 5 minutes with her, and she was your best friend. I never quite understood how she had this effect on others. At her memorial last Saturday I called it "The Elizabeth Effect". People would just open up to her. I would come downstairs some days to my friends having heart to hearts with her, or even after I would do something with a girl at a party, I never felt awkward telling her, even though that is like the first thing teens NEVER tell their parents. It doesn't make sense, it's like her presence was a truth serum, but in a good way. I'm scared I'll never be able to open up to someone the way I did to her.
She was also a shirt-off-their-back kind of person. Everything she did was selfless. I already mentioned the husband thing, but she even would spend her last dollars she had, or sometimes didn't have, just to get me or my sister what we needed. Sure, she indulged in her own interests every once in a while, but if it was between her or anyone else she cared about, they came first. I wish I had the words to explain this more eloquently, but it is something that can only be experienced, and it no longer can.
I have decided that I am going to live for her. I am going to be everything she would want. She viewed the world in a way I'm not sure anyone else did. She saw the beauty in everyone, their strengths, and weaknesses, and always knew the right thing to say to help them grow; it is part of the Elizabeth Effect. I want to take her greatness and help it spread throughout the world. All she wanted was a happier world, from that cute little flower child inside her. I want to make her wish come true, and I will. I will make this world a better place for her. I am part of her legacy, and I will continue it.
samblank95 samblank95
18-21, M
Dec 9, 2012