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Losing My Sister, Losing Half of Myself

Mom found the knot on her neck Thanksgiving 2001, Rachel was a freshman at Morehead state university.  December the 3rd, the doctors diagnosed her with Hodgkin's Lymphoma. 

She immediately underwent chemo and radiation, she had to drop out of college.  She lost most of her hair.  She was only 18yrs old. 

After 8mths of treatment she went back for the last cat scan to be considered in remission.  The drs found "hot spots" on the gallium scan.  The cancer was back.  She was sent to another hospital where she had high dose chemo and a stem cell transplant with her own stem cells to boost her immune system.

The chemo destroyed her heart and lungs her body was never the same.  In 2004, the cancer was back for the 3rd time.  She needed another stem cell transplant.  I was a perfect match.  We did it but 9mths after it was back again and the drs could do nothing.

She did radiation and chemo to control the growth rate but she was soon sent home on hospice.  She passed away on a Thursday morning, July 28th 2005.  she was only 22yrs old. 

She left behind her loving parents, her only sibling-me, and her 1 niece and 3 nephews(my kids), as well as her many friends.

I know work part time with the Leuk and lymph society trying to raise awareness with blood cancers and fundraising.

2yrs later it still hurts, not all days are hard but some are like the same day I found otu she died.  I love and miss Rachel with all my heart.  The seasons change and my sister is gone

beccalynne21 beccalynne21 31-35, F 7 Responses Aug 12, 2007

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That's cruelty of life. I am so sorry...only what I can say

I came across this story by searching Morehead State University. I have never lost a loved one to cancer, but I have lost a best friend/ex-boyfriend to drugs, a cousin to drugs, a cousin to a freak accident at work, my papaw in surgery, and my dad to suicide. All in the past four years. I do not understand your pain, but I understand what pain can be like. I am touched by your story and I wish you the best in turning that pain into something positive. It isn't easy. I try to stay connected with my dad and best friend. I can feel them all around me most of the time, especially when I need them the most or when I least expect it. It's a great feeling. I'm sure you are able to do the same with your sister.

I am so sorry to hear that, but still believe that Lord knows the best for us. Actually I have lost 2 my sisters also in cancer. colon cancer and Lung.

I am so sorry to hear that, but still believe that Lord knows the best for us. Actually I have lost 2 my sisters also in cancer. colon cancer and Lung.

Hi my name is Sean <br />
I have just lost my <br />
beautiful sister to cancer she leaves behind two children which my other sister will look after <br />
I stayed with her the last eight days and held her hand as she past away a have nothing left but love for her and this poem I wrote for her children.<br />
<br />
Garden of the Heart<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
In everyone’s heart there is a flower garden. <br />
<br />
For each person who loves you - a special flower grows. <br />
<br />
The deeper that persons love for you,<br />
<br />
the more colourful the flower grows.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
In each garden, there is a flower that is brighter and more colourful than all the others. <br />
<br />
This is the mother flower.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Sometimes in the garden, a very special mother flower grows. <br />
<br />
Her beauty and radiance is greater than any other flower,<br />
<br />
but she blossoms early, and dies before the other flowers die.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
The other flowers in the garden feel that a great beauty has been lost,<br />
<br />
and the sister and brother flowers of the mother grow larger and more <br />
<br />
colourful, to protect the small flowers of the mother.<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
The mother flower blows a message in the wind: “Do not worry if you <br />
cry. Let the tears flow, for they are watering our special garden.’<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Do not fear if you feel alone, for this is the wind that I am sending, to <br />
make the sister and brother flowers bend to cuddle you, when I am <br />
not there.’<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
Do not worry about me, for I have gone to a heavenly <br />
garden to see my own mother flower.<br />
<br />
I have gone to the light and I will shine down upon you.<br />
<br />
I will watch you grow and become more radiant and deeper in colour.<br />
<br />
The light of my love will always shine upon you.”

I am so sorry that you lost your sister to cancer. Thank you for sharing your story.

This is an incredibly touching story. Our hearts are with you and your family. Thank you for sharing.